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Old 08-07-05   #1
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If Your Child is a Gothic, Reform Through the Lord!

Quote:
If Your Child is a Gothic, Reform Through the Lord!

Listed below are some warning signs to indicate if your
child may have gone astray from the Lord.

Gothic (or goth) is a very obscure and often dangerous
culture that young teenagers are prone to participating in. The gothic culture leads young, susceptible minds into an imagined world of evil,darkness, and violence. Please seek immediate attention through counselling, prayer,
and parental guidance to rid your child of Satan’s temptations if five or more of the following are applicable to your child:

-Frequently wears black clothing.

-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.

-Wears excessive black eye makeup, lipstick or nailpolish.

-Wears any odd, silver jewelry or symbols. Some of these include: reversed crosses, pentagrams, pentacles, ankhs or various other Satanic worshipping symbols.

-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.

-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)

-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.

-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.

-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.

-Takes drugs.

-Drinks alcohol.

-Is suicidal and/or depressed.

-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation. (This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.)

-Complains of boredom.

-Sleeps too excessively or too little.

-Is excessively awake during the night.

-Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light. (This pertains to vampires promoting the idea that His light is of no use.)

-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.

-Spends large amounts of time alone.

-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your chid may speak to evil sprits through meditation.)

-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.

-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and
elders are but a few examples of this.

-Misbehaves at school.

-Misbehaves at home.

-Eats excessively or too little.

-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this.

-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)

-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)

-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.

-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.

-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.

-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.

-Expresses an interest in sex.

-Masturbates

-Is homosexual and/or bisexual. Boiling

-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism, Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.

-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: “I’m so gothic, I’m dead”, “woe is me”, “I’m a goth”.

-Claims to be a goth.

If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your local mental health center.

~St. Mary’s Catholic Church
The spam I get is so entertaining. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to sacrifice a made-up goat, on my ankh-shaped altar, while dressed in black, listening to Marilyn Manson, to make up for the depression my self-mutilation caused me while I was masturbating.

Last edited by gArGOyLe^^; 08-07-05 at 14:01.
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Old 08-07-05   #2
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Quote:
-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your chid may speak to evil sprits through meditation.)
this fuckin' made me laugh so much....

Quote:
-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.
holy hell religious fucks are fucked up...

Quote:
-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this.
what? never heard of Count Dracula cereal...i've heard of Count Chocula though
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Old 08-07-05   #3
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Originally Posted by gArGOyle^^
-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal.
HAHAHA
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Old 08-07-05   #4
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lol I saw this on a nother forum, it's utterly stupid. Quite entertaining to read though
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Old 08-07-05   #5
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Yeah. Seems i'm a "gothic" times six O_O
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Old 08-07-05   #6
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Yeah. Seems i'm a "gothic" times six O_O
darn wierdo paki-goths......
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Old 08-07-05   #7
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This was posted on another forum I'm a member of in retaliation. I thought it was quite humerous:

Quote:
Is Your Child A "Christian"? Presented by Error
Listed below are some warning signs to indicate if your child may have succumbed to the mind-numbing power that organized religion exerts over many aspects of our culture. Christianity is a vindictive philosophy which seeks to juxtapose free thought and true moralism with the patriarchal beliefs and extreme social restrictions of an antiquated cult. Brain-washing and unquestioning obedience to such nonexistent powers as "the lord" and "jesus" may ensue and may lead to your child leading an unfulfilling life, constantly questioning his or her ability to venerate the most natural urges he or she might have, and general mental malaise and anger. If your child exhibits even a single one of the following behaviors, consult a drug dealer immediately.

-Wears jesus t-shirts.

-Seeks to inundate relatives, friends, and strangers with "knowledge of the lord".

-Wears any odd silver jewelry or symbols, such as crosses or cruciforms.

-Listens to christian music or refuses to acknowledge the creativity assosciated with other forms of music.

-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak just like everyone else.

-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: drugs, sex, and rock & roll.

-Shows an increasing interest in the bible, the lord, proving others wrong, and seeking to "save" wayward souls.

-Takes communion.

-Is obnoxiously and seemingly needlessly optimistic, although a secret vindictive and calculating jealousy may brew beneath this front.

-Happily completes work.

-Listens to you.

-Falls alseep before 10 pm regularly.

-Does not acknowledge the existence of bodily functions.

-Spends large amounts of time at church.

-Does not require any privacy. (Privacy is for those who do not depend on others to be spoon-fed their opinions).

-Insists on spending time with priests while unaccompanied by an adult.

-Regards authority figures such as teachers, priests, nuns, and elders with the utmost respect.

-Behaves at school.

-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Communion, anyone?)

-Does not like video games and is unable to use his or her imagination.

-Views the internet as a useless tool; all the answers he or she may need are contained in the bible.

-Prays.

-Does NOT express an interest in sex.

-Does NOT masturbate.

-Claims that heterosexuality is the correct way for man to live.

-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contain these various phrases: "I <3 Jesus", "Jesus Saves", or "Jesus Loves You".

If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene immediately and teach your child to correctly use his or her brain. Fill your house with books that contain real knowledge. The Christian religion is dangerous and mindlessness thrives within it. If any of these problems persist, drop your child off in the wilderness and see if his or her god comes to save him or her.
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Old 08-07-05   #8
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If my kid came home with those symptoms I would reform them through a swift kick in the ass.
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Old 08-07-05   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sixxx(sic)six
this fuckin' made me laugh so much....


holy hell religious fucks are fucked up...
Yeah those stupid religious fucks.. how dare they want to keep an eye on thier children! I mean when the FUCK will religion end? I mean A 12 year old cant even get an abortion anymore without telling her mother. I mean FUCKING RELIGION AHHHHRRGGH
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Old 08-07-05   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.
oh yes, piercings and tattoos are satanic signs.

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)
doing stuff like this to teenagers fucks them up. my folks ripped apart my cds and cassettes (even shit like NIN and silverchair) and shredded my black clothes with a steak knife. kinda makes growing up hell. since ive moved out, i dont fucking call them. im sure they wonder why. ill just leave em to figure it out on their own.

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.
cant have friends that arent normal? c'mon! this is not the goddamned 50s! these fuckers wanna pretend it is.

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.
wholesome?? church and the bible? you GOTTA be kidding me. the church is far more corrupt than any self-proclaimed satanist.


Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Takes drugs.

-Drinks alcohol.

-Is suicidal and/or depressed.
i thought this was a parents job to address these issues. speak to your fucking kids, dont condemn them. this is NOT a goth thing. clinical depression is real. depression is real is everyone not just the 'goth' group. the church is making themselves look like retards.


Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Complains of boredom.

-Sleeps too excessively or too little.
o0o0o0oh, kids are bored?? MUST BE SATAN AND THE GOTHS!!! sleepy or not tired?? MUST BE SATAN AND THE GOTHS!!! (do these idiots even listen to the shit that spews from their mouths?)

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Is excessively awake during the night.
yeah thats not insomnia or anything.

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.

-Spends large amounts of time alone.
*gasp* teenagers want privacy???? UNHEARD OF!

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your chid may speak to evil sprits through meditation.)
theyre kidding right? what? are mommy and daddy supposed to keep their 'kid' within their sights at all times so as to make sure their 'child' does not fall into the temptation of satan?? LAME. oddly enough, what if the kid decided he wants to be a Buddhist? theyll explain this too....

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.
a teen doesnt want to be followed around everywhere by a parent? really? gee, go figure. must be because theyre being goth and worshipping the devil.

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and
elders are but a few examples of this.

-Misbehaves at school.

-Misbehaves at home.

-Eats excessively or too little.
misbehaving anywhere and disregarding any authority figures? well then damn near every teenager in the world must be 'goth'. funny how the stupid shit that all teens do is now considered criteria for being 'goth'. this would be the church using scare tactics to get more people to force their kids into religion. because free thinkers are dangerous.

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this.
me to psyko (after reading the above): BABE!!! we need to go buy some Count Chocula cereal! what if we have friends over and they dont think we are 'goth' because we dont offer them a bowl!? maybe the dressing in black and piercings and tattoos arent enough! what if we arent goth enough??

psyko and me: laughing at the ridiculousness of previously mentioned above statement.

psyko: count dracula cereal? fuckers cant even get the name right. its count chocula. im sure these are the same asshats that hand out booklets on halloween, proclaiming the holiday is evil.

me: next, the church will be saying that sesame street isnt wholesome for kids cos theres a vampire puppet on it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)
i had to mention this cone due to the underlined part. i though that drinking blood was how vampires attained FOOD. besides, the church has always stated that vampires didnt exist, and now theyre speaking like they do exist. they need to get their facts straight.

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)

-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.

-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.
cable television is bad? video games are bad? internet is bad? no wonder the fucking kids are bored!!!! cant let me watch sesame street, theres vampires. internet? who needs technology!? they wanna learn HTML so they can get a better job when they grow up? HTML is the devils tool. so is the internet. only 'goths' do these things? LAME.

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.

-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.
Elvis? so no one should dance provocatively? so pretty much all of todays pop stars are out huh? whats left? country and christian? go figure. and no shaking head to music.....WHY?!

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Expresses an interest in sex.

-Masturbates

-Is homosexual and/or bisexual. Boiling
if youre child is interested in sex, masturbation or their sexuality, its evil and 'goth'? BULLSHIT!

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism, Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.
OH! soo ANY other religion thats not based on the virgin mary, and jesus is EVIL!? Philosophy for example??? LOL! and Hinduism and Buddhism are evil tools of the devil? even tho Buddhism is meditation to attain freedom from 'suffering' and attain peace and elightenment thru meditation? oh yes, that is just SO 'goth'.

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Marys Catholic Church
If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your local mental health center.

~St. Mary’s Catholic Church
satanists dont even believe in satan! satan doesnt even exist! nobody is worshipping the devil cos the devil isnt real.
are they really that stupid? im scared for the future is shit like that continues.
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Old 08-07-05   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by J0hnnyReb
Yeah those stupid religious fucks.. how dare they want to keep an eye on thier children! I mean when the FUCK will religion end? I mean A 12 year old cant even get an abortion anymore without telling her mother. I mean FUCKING RELIGION AHHHHRRGGH
They are keeping an eye on their kids incase they eat count chocula cereal.. masturbate.. or get bored... or read philosophy

yeah.. what are they thinking?
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Old 08-07-05   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gArGOyLe^^
They are keeping an eye on their kids incase they eat count chocula cereal.. masturbate.. or get bored... or read philosophy

yeah.. what are they thinking?
Yes youre right theyre making sure thier kids dont eat chocolate cereal or jerk off but let them tour the night and cause mayham right? please. If i got kids I wont let them eat Count Chocula either, know how bad for your teeth that shit is?
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Old 08-07-05   #13
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They aren't stopping them from eating count chocula because its bad for the kids teeth. They are stopping them because the cereal is satanic.

The people who wrote this probably don't have teeth.
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Old 08-07-05   #14
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I guess the means justify the ends the kids will be better off without eating that crap. And I tend to like overzealous parents than the type that give thier kids freedom. At least the overzealous ones are doing what they think is right instead of worrying about themselves. Neglect your kid and dont find out what thier doing and you get what? Columbine thats right.
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Old 08-07-05   #15
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Am I the only one who worries about what sort of person would fall for such a list?

"Oh Goodness! My child shows more than five of these symptoms! REPENT REPENT!"
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Old 08-07-05   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by J0hnnyReb
I guess the means justify the ends the kids will be better off without eating that crap. And I tend to like overzealous parents than the type that give thier kids freedom. At least the overzealous ones are doing what they think is right instead of worrying about themselves. Neglect your kid and dont find out what thier doing and you get what? Columbine thats right.
if people taught their kids common sense and some semblance of morals (dont need to be religious) and just let their kids decide if religion is right for them and which ones without being forced, shit like Columbine wouldnt happen. or perhaps it would. kids will pick on kids for any reason at all. theres no way to make the world completly safe. but to try an induce fear of NOTHING to up the church attendance by lying to parents is bullshit.

its fucked up thinking like that that ruins lives. if a kid is depressed and seeking solace in a cd by manson because the find comfort in it (not uncommon) and the parents take away their cds, rip up their manson shirts, and tell them to dress in something else cos they dont want to be seen with their kid looking like hes dressed for a funeral, the kid is gonna feel really hopeless and the sitch will get worse. jesus, all kids fucking want as teenagers is to be accepted.
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Old 08-07-05   #17
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if people taught their kids common sense and some semblance of morals (dont need to be religious) and just let their kids decide if religion is right for them and which ones without being forced, shit like Columbine wouldnt happen. or perhaps it would. kids will pick on kids for any reason at all. theres no way to make the world completly safe. but to try an induce fear or NOTHING to up the church attendance by lying to parents is bullshit.

well you get freedom or mroals one or the other and moral preaching these days is dubbed to be religious. SO freedom it is. WHich is why shit like columbine happend. If those kids aprents had loved thier sons enough to find out how thier lives at school were, or asked them how thier day was going or checked under thier bed for playboys and found a mach 10 then it wouldnt have happend. Instead though the idea that kids need freedom was upheld and they did get freedom, the freedom to gun down thier classmates.

its fucked up thinking like that that ruins lives. if a kid is depressed and seeking solace in a cd by manson because the find comfort in it (not uncommon) and the parents take away their cds, rip up their manson shirts, and tell them to dress in something else cos they dont want to be seen with their kid looking like hes dressed for a funeral, the kid is gonna feel really hopeless and the sitch will get worse. jesus, all kids fucking want as teenagers is to be accepted.
[

I agree if youre not going to give your kdis solace you shouldnt take away the only thign they find comfort in. We arent talking about that though we are making fun of proactive parents who make sure they know whats going on in thier kids lives remember? hahaha fucking christians.hahaha so uninformed, I mean theyre like taking an ACTIVE role in parenting HAHAHA assholes.
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Old 08-07-05   #18
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you're defending an illogical perspective simply on the basis that it "might" (not definately will) increase the "role" of parenting?

how fuckin' ridiculous is that?!

ignorance must be bliss to you....

look, i got nuttin' against religious folk or their methods, but if your child wants to join some "group" then you should at least be open minded enough to truly understand the group before makin' a rational decision........if your kid wants to join some wave of neo-nazi skinheads, then by all means, intervene.......if you're kid wants to be a goth, or a wannabe, or gay, or whatever it is you don't understand, then at least try to understand.......

ripping an identity away from a kid is just as bad as avoiding your kid......they're just as likely as to do something illogical.........parents seem to forget that they have to be the parent while at the same time understanding that their child is a person and will want to establish an identity.....for cryin' out loud, chances are they'll out grow it......bein' a teenager only lasts for so long.......but in the end, you must be an active parent, but not a fuckin' tyrant!

case in point:

me -- my mom and i went rounds when i was a teenager; she would throw away my clothes, rip down my posters, scold me often for my attire and the music i listened to....but when she finally realized that this is who i was, and that i was a good kid (i didn't do drugs, i didn't drink, i didn't commit crimes, i did well in school and was active in certain things) then she opened up to my culture a bit and her and i have had a good parent-child relationship....hell, she even likes Type-O-Negative and Tool and Acid Bath....wow!

my friend -- his parents totally ripped away his identity...sent him to boarding school....punished him reguraly, and when they saw that he wouldn't change, they abondoned him....for years he lived on the street.....he became heavily addicted to drugs, overdosed a few times, and has tried REAL suicide attempts several times.....now, he's cleaned up, doin' well for himself, about to own a business of his own, and although he loves his parents and respects them, he doesn't have the greatest parent-child relationship.......

so, which parent do you think is better? mine, or my friend's?
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Old 08-07-05   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sixxx(sic)six
you're defending an illogical perspective simply on the basis that it "might" (not definately will) increase the "role" of parenting?

how fuckin' ridiculous is that?!

ignorance must be bliss to you....

look, i got nuttin' against religious folk or their methods, but if your child wants to join some "group" then you should at least be open minded enough to truly understand the group before makin' a rational decision........if your kid wants to join some wave of neo-nazi skinheads, then by all means, intervene.......if you're kid wants to be a goth, or a wannabe, or gay, or whatever it is you don't understand, then at least try to understand.......

ripping an identity away from a kid is just as bad as avoiding your kid......they're just as likely as to do something illogical.........parents seem to forget that they have to be the parent while at the same time understanding that their child is a person and will want to establish an identity.....for cryin' out loud, chances are they'll out grow it......bein' a teenager only lasts for so long.......but in the end, you must be an active parent, but not a fuckin' tyrant!

case in point:

me -- my mom and i went rounds when i was a teenager; she would throw away my clothes, rip down my posters, scold me often for my attire and the music i listened to....but when she finally realized that this is who i was, and that i was a good kid (i didn't do drugs, i didn't drink, i didn't commit crimes, i did well in school and was active in certain things) then she opened up to my culture a bit and her and i have had a good parent-child relationship....hell, she even likes Type-O-Negative and Tool and Acid Bath....wow!

my friend -- his parents totally ripped away his identity...sent him to boarding school....punished him reguraly, and when they saw that he wouldn't change, they abondoned him....for years he lived on the street.....he became heavily addicted to drugs, overdosed a few times, and has tried REAL suicide attempts several times.....now, he's cleaned up, doin' well for himself, about to own a business of his own, and although he loves his parents and respects them, he doesn't have the greatest parent-child relationship.......

so, which parent do you think is better? mine, or my friend's?
EXACTLY. my folks and i dont have the best relationship, but if they had just let me be myself, we would be fine. im 24 and still bitter at them for controlling my life as much as they did. they only let up just before i moved out, but still did what they could to control me. tell me what i couldnt wear and such. i respected them to a point, if my dad asked me to change my shirt cos he didnt like manson or NIN, id change it to something he didnt find so offensive. whatever. no big deal. but when decided they were going to ground me up until the age of 23 for stupid shit....look thru my personal belongings and the like....destroy my drawings *i still hold a massive grudge for that one*, and thats the sort of stuff that kept me bitter. i didnt do drugs really, didnt drink, wasnt having sex, didnt break curfew, didnt start fights or do anything illegal. stupid shit like slamming a door would get me a punishment like being grounded for a week, and a formal written apology to the door for slamming it. (my dad really is retired military. can you tell?)

all in all my relationship between me and my dad is pretty much fine. my mom is a different story. shes kinda psycho.
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Old 08-07-05   #20
J0hnnyReb
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This is who I was... yeeeah. Right. I "tried" to be things when I was a kid too, my dad smacked it outta me. Eventually i figured out how lame it was to be goth or pretend to be manic depressive and all that BS. Im sure you will too one day.

And its not bullshit. These people are more respectable than parents who let thier kids grow wild.
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