Darkforum.com - Dark Stories, Dark Art, Poetry, Photography, Debates and Discussions
Home Register FAQ
Go Back   Darkforum.com - Dark Stories, Dark Art, Poetry, Photography, Debates and Discussions > Discussions > Mayhem
Reload this Page Hey.
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-21-04   #1
Kendra
Darkness Incarnate
 
Kendra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,442
Kendra will become famous soon enough
Credits: 661,738
Hey.

I know its been a while. Well I thought I should start this up again on having another journal. You don't have to be in here if you don't want to. Remember I am not pointing a gun to your forhead and DEMAND that you sit here and read my journal giggles. It's YOUR CHOICE to make and not mine. So do as you want.

Well i'm sitting here in the dark typing. I'm also having a conversation with DarkTigger through a private message about what is going on with me. This was are private message.



lay's you down on the couch*
*gets notpad and pen*
I am wondering, and it might be pertinant to your paticular situation.. Have you ever had a bad 'involvement'(rape, incest, molestation, ect) in the past? or.... Did your mom ever talk about how men are evil, and along the lines of the previous question, when you were younger? and/or, have friends that went through those type of situations that were/are friends??
Any of the above may cause a 'dislike' towards the male of our species.LOL..

I think that maybe the reason that you may tend to see more of a relationship than friendship is due to the fact you most likely are two things.. A romantic, and a co-dependant type of person.. These two personality types, when combined, often causes the effect.. Like being an alchoholic, it is something you have to fight with yourself to control.. (i know this from personal experience as well as friends i have known)

As far as dealing with your problem of believing that a friendship is a relationship, or always ending up that way.. All i can truely suggest to you is that you think as logically as you can about what is happeneing with the person and then try to see if you might be seeing more than is actually there to begin with.. Or, Question yourself about what your doing and how your acting.. And if you find that you are pushing something you didn't intend to, then just laugh at your horemones and keep going.. LOL no harm, no foul.....

k simply put, if you meet someone you think would make a good friend, then remember That is what they are.. male female or trans-sexual hehe
Try to hold yourself back from the relationship view point. Let them be blatent about what they want..
If then you find that the 'straight' ones want to be involved with you, look at that bridge when you see it under your feet.. don't look for it before then..
Hmm, maybe even simpler way would be.. Don't look for the relationship, Let it look for you!!

I seriously wished that I didn't erase my other private messages, while him and I were talking in them. Once when I responded back to him.

I'm guessing on this one. Since i've been posting in "The undies of Darkforum." People wanted to see what I look like in my underwear. But i'm really flattered about how you people want to see me in my underwear and all. Really I am....... Still i'm not comfortable about posting my naked self on Darkforum at all, and i'll never post my naked body on Darkforum ever. So what I did was... I went to Google and found a women in a her underwear, and then I posted it in "The undies of Darkforum" thread. And while posting a picture of women from Google on there. I came out and said this "Ok I hope that this would work. If not then I don't know what to tell you. This is me in my underwear" Which that wasn't me in my underwear and that was someone else.

So after he caught me lying in that thread. He thinks i'm lying about the problem that i'm having and this is what he said "i'm sarcastic, use adult humor often, and find humor to be one of the better things in life...(just so you know)

you , well, i have picked a few things out so far.. And much is obvious from your statements.. Unless of course you lied in many of your posts.."

Oh my god........................... Well if it's going to come down to that, then i'm serioiusly not going speak what is on my mind anymore, WHEN I talk to someone about one of my issue's. I think it's best if I keep all of my crap bottled up inside and deal with it my self. I don't care if I torture my self with it again. Well that is lie of course. I will care if I torture my self with my own problems.

I'm seriously not the kind of person that would lie, i'll only lie if I have a reason to lie about something. Like in "Adult Images" sections.

Next time i'm just going to keep my mouth shut, when ever I have a problem. Because I seriously don't want things to happen like that, like what happened between me and Darktigger.

Man I seriously wished I didn't fucking erased what I have said to him though. Maybe it was all just a big missunderstanding and i'm hoping that it's a big missunderstanding. I'm going to keep my god dam fingers crossed with this one.

You want to know what would seriously be nice though? I wish that people could stop missunderstanding me!! People missunderstand me way too fucking much...... Am I really that hard to understand people? Please stop missunderstanding me.............................................................................. .............

But with this kind of problem which I am having. NO I haven't been in a rape, incest, or molestationpast?

Then on to the other thing which was this "or.... Did your mom ever talk about how men are evil, and along the lines of the previous question, when you were younger? and/or, have friends that went through those type of situations that were/are friends??
Any of the above may cause a 'dislike' towards the male of our species.LOL.."

I only had one friend in high school. AND his name was Joe..... He was the only friend I seriously ever had in high school. Untill I met this chick name Dee and she was the new person in my high school. Untill I ran into her she introduced me to other people. All of these people I new were straight and none of them had this kind of situation that I seem to have. But i'm not with people anymore and i'm know a loner and always will be a loner. I don't go out or do anything anymore. Seriously I have no one but my family. And my family only........... The only thing that I have is the people on the fucking internet!! That is all to be able to communite with.

God this fucking sucks oh well............... So no more speaking about my problems. I'm going to shut up about from know on. Cause I seriously don't want this kind of crap to happen.

So that should tell you people something. Since I only had a guy friend and never had a girl who was a friend. That is what confuses me about this. Well that is what my mom says and thinks. About my situation that is.

Wish I could go some place and hide there for a while. To where no one could ever find me.

I'm confused and I don't know what the hell I like between either of the sexes. Also how can I be confused since I haven't had any kind of expereince with either one of them, while still being a virgin at the age of 23 and almost turning 24?

Last edited by Shy shy; 05-21-04 at 23:35.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #2
Kendra
Darkness Incarnate
 
Kendra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,442
Kendra will become famous soon enough
Credits: 661,738
Shit!!
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #3
Kendra
Darkness Incarnate
 
Kendra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,442
Kendra will become famous soon enough
Credits: 661,738
"God dam does it feel good to fry my conscience........................... Fry fucking fry!! Don't worry soon this will all be over. MMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmm Yeah......"


Last edited by Shy shy; 05-22-04 at 10:41.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #4
Kendra
Darkness Incarnate
 
Kendra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,442
Kendra will become famous soon enough
Credits: 661,738
Screw you!!

Last edited by Shy shy; 05-22-04 at 14:18.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #5
Icey_Blueyez
Darkness Incarnate
 
Icey_Blueyez's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 7,998
Icey_Blueyez is on a distinguished road
Credits: 113,239
*runs in and sits down*
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #6
Kendra
Darkness Incarnate
 
Kendra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,442
Kendra will become famous soon enough
Credits: 661,738
Hey nice to see you in here!! I'm glad that you decided to stop by.............. Well you are the only person I care about to come in here anyway. Because you are seriously the ONLY person I am fucking used to on Darkforum. Because you talk to me every single day and i'm used to you. Oh yeah finished my prank by the way and hit the submit button. Now i'm going to see if these people would help me out or not. I just want them to mess with Kevin while he is at work, and I told them he does for his job and I gave them his work number........... I'm seriously going to record this on tape so I can listen to it over and over and over and just laugh my ass off. Because of the stunt I pulled on him.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #7
Kendra
Darkness Incarnate
 
Kendra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,442
Kendra will become famous soon enough
Credits: 661,738


God this is so much fun. Round and around and around.............

Last edited by Shy shy; 05-22-04 at 14:14.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #8
Kendra
Darkness Incarnate
 
Kendra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,442
Kendra will become famous soon enough
Credits: 661,738
Kevin came by today. Only he didn't stay here for long though. He just mainly stopped by to say "Hi" and to give me his pack of cigarettes. As he gave me his pack of cigarettes he said "Marry Christmass HAHAH... I'm not going to be smoking with you anymore." So I took his pack of cigarettes and hugged him. Kevin realized that he is getting addicted to cigarette smoking and that has scared him. So instead he gave me his pack of cigarettes. Know I only have two small packs of different kind. I have the Marlboro lights AND I have the Marlboro Ultra lights. In the Marlboro lights that I have. I only have like about 7 cigarettes. In the Ultra light pack I have hah 7 as well. I'm smoking one from the Ultra Marlboro light pack at the moment. Man I smoke as if these are going out of style and I don't pace my self. I'm going to die if I don't stop smoking............................. Well with the i'm going at it. Two packs and if I finish these two. I'll smoke even more.

If you think about smoking, don't be a fucking MORON. Just say "NO!" And of course these cigarettes will feel hurt though. But i'm sure they can understand.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #9
Kendra
Darkness Incarnate
 
Kendra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,442
Kendra will become famous soon enough
Credits: 661,738
I'm sitting here and i'm listening to Stone Sour............................... Great band to let out some anger. Also i'm messing around with my other journal, which I have on OpenDiary..... In that one i'm not going to say anything in it anymore. So instead i'm going to put down pictures on how i'm feeling and such instead of sitting here and writting about it..... Of coursed I changed the coloring and the writting front style. I'm not going to accept notes in it anymore. Not that they were bad notes or anything like that. Just felt like taking that option away. How I post my pictures on there as well as on here. I go to www.photobucket.com
So that is the site I use to post pictures where ever I want to post them. Incase you people are interesting in my other journal. I'll post ith ere for you all to view on the pictures I pick out for my emotions.......

http://www.opendiary.com/entrylist.a...orcode=D177367


I hope this link works and if it does work, then let me know. Also if you want to leave a comment about that diary of mine. Post them in here.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #10
Kendra
Darkness Incarnate
 
Kendra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,442
Kendra will become famous soon enough
Credits: 661,738
Shit it doesn't work and it says this.

"The author has set this diary page to only be viewed by Open Diary members. You must have an Open Diary and be logged in to access it.
Click the button to go to The Open Diary home page, or your back button to return to where you came from."

So i'm going to fix that problem of mine.

Here we go again............................

http://www.opendiary.com/entrylist.a...orcode=D177367


Hope that it works this time.


Ok I just now checked it out. I just have to logg in is all...........
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #11
Icey_Blueyez
Darkness Incarnate
 
Icey_Blueyez's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 7,998
Icey_Blueyez is on a distinguished road
Credits: 113,239
DUDE CALM DOWN WITH ALL THE TYPING....I HAVE A.D.D....SO YA....



ps...I really dont i just love to tell people i do! But shhhh dont tell anyone my secret....



OK BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (i love saying that in my lil kid voice...mwhaha)


Oh and ur making me dizzy!
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #12
AbstractEvil
Bona Fide
 
AbstractEvil's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: England - Staffordshire
Posts: 2,000
AbstractEvil
Credits: 41,263
Hey shy. You are opening up so much recently (good for you ) and as for stopping talking about your problems I dont think anyone could care less the amount you talked of them on here because its your journal. You do whatever the bloody hell you want to do with it. Next time for all the people with supposed ADD's out there *coughs*tijuana*coughs* excuse me maybe you should post it in seperate posts to keep their attention span up to some standards while boosting you post count speak to you later bab x
__________________
LUCAS:Joe, I think its gonna be ok
JOE:What makes you think that?
LUCAS:Who knows where thoughts come from? They just appear.

Occupation - waitress at Anti-Social Pizzeria
Manager and owner of Anomynous Hotel.

Blind pugh - bar man
Velvet - Bar mans "assistant"
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #13
Kendra
Darkness Incarnate
 
Kendra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,442
Kendra will become famous soon enough
Credits: 661,738
You seriously have ADD? Wow I didn't know that. But don't worry your secret is safe with me!! Don't mean to make you dizzy
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #14
Kendra
Darkness Incarnate
 
Kendra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,442
Kendra will become famous soon enough
Credits: 661,738
Quote:
Originally Posted by AbstractEvil
Hey shy. You are opening up so much recently (good for you ) and as for stopping talking about your problems I dont think anyone could care less the amount you talked of them on here because its your journal. You do whatever the bloody hell you want to do with it. Next time for all the people with supposed ADD's out there *coughs*tijuana*coughs* excuse me maybe you should post it in seperate posts to keep their attention span up to some standards while boosting you post count speak to you later bab x

Thank you!

But no she is a friend of mine. So it's all cool with her though. But if it's someone else. I wouldn't care either way you know.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #15
AbstractEvil
Bona Fide
 
AbstractEvil's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: England - Staffordshire
Posts: 2,000
AbstractEvil
Credits: 41,263
I was only jesting anyway. Im bored, what more can I say
__________________
LUCAS:Joe, I think its gonna be ok
JOE:What makes you think that?
LUCAS:Who knows where thoughts come from? They just appear.

Occupation - waitress at Anti-Social Pizzeria
Manager and owner of Anomynous Hotel.

Blind pugh - bar man
Velvet - Bar mans "assistant"
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #16
Kendra
Darkness Incarnate
 
Kendra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,442
Kendra will become famous soon enough
Credits: 661,738
Hey it's cool!! Remember I don't things so personally anymore. I've changed since i've been away from this place.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #17
AbstractEvil
Bona Fide
 
AbstractEvil's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: England - Staffordshire
Posts: 2,000
AbstractEvil
Credits: 41,263
well it seems like a pretty good change to me. I mean I didnt speak to you that much before but you seem like a really cool nice person to me. You really shouldn't be so hard on yourself and let things get you down. Everyone has problems but your still young, you still have time to solve your problems rather than dwelling on them for the rest of yourself. Have more confidence in yourself I mean Im not one to speak but you know what I mean
__________________
LUCAS:Joe, I think its gonna be ok
JOE:What makes you think that?
LUCAS:Who knows where thoughts come from? They just appear.

Occupation - waitress at Anti-Social Pizzeria
Manager and owner of Anomynous Hotel.

Blind pugh - bar man
Velvet - Bar mans "assistant"
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #18
Kendra
Darkness Incarnate
 
Kendra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,442
Kendra will become famous soon enough
Credits: 661,738
Quote:
Originally Posted by AbstractEvil
well it seems like a pretty good change to me. I mean I didnt speak to you that much before but you seem like a really cool nice person to me. You really shouldn't be so hard on yourself and let things get you down. Everyone has problems but your still young, you still have time to solve your problems rather than dwelling on them for the rest of yourself. Have more confidence in yourself I mean Im not one to speak but you know what I mean

Yeah I seriously dwel alot! Guess there is still alot of things that I need to work with, but I need to have motavation. Of course I remember how you and I used to have are little chats before, but i'm glad that we are getting back to talking again. Thanks for saying that i'm a nice person though
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #19
AbstractEvil
Bona Fide
 
AbstractEvil's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: England - Staffordshire
Posts: 2,000
AbstractEvil
Credits: 41,263
Theres no need for thanks for just stating a fact At least you seem to be helping your self out a lot by opening up your feelings an everything like that. Its nice to have you back
__________________
LUCAS:Joe, I think its gonna be ok
JOE:What makes you think that?
LUCAS:Who knows where thoughts come from? They just appear.

Occupation - waitress at Anti-Social Pizzeria
Manager and owner of Anomynous Hotel.

Blind pugh - bar man
Velvet - Bar mans "assistant"
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-22-04   #20
Kendra
Darkness Incarnate
 
Kendra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 27,442
Kendra will become famous soon enough
Credits: 661,738
Thank you I had help from One, Tijuana Bandit, and Crypt.

Yeah I noticed how i've been opening up around here, from how I was in the past. In the past I didn't open up as much, as I am opening up now. Kind of weird if you ask me. Well I wouldn't say that i'm doing anything about my problem, yet I talked to someone about it, and with the statements that i've made, he thinks i'm lying about it............... Didn't like how that went. See that is another reason why I don't want to open up to someone about my problem. At least I talked about it and that made me feel better, still didn't like how that ended.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On


Recent Threads
Fuck Snow
1 Day Ago 03:36
Last post by Wicked Lady
12 Hours Ago 03:44
What Are you Listening...
03-21-05 07:40
By Cucking Funt
Last post by Sic Simon
3 Days Ago 23:59
are you gonna eat your...
11-01-17 01:43
Last post by Sic Simon
5 Days Ago 03:45
Things that I'm not...
10-30-05 21:09
Last post by Sic Simon
5 Days Ago 00:51
Science Disproves...
11-01-10 15:38
by Pahu
Last post by Pahu
6 Days Ago 14:34
Hey fr0g
10-20-17 02:49
Last post by Sic Simon
1 Week Ago 00:24
basic earthling rights
07-17-14 22:08
Last post by Sic Simon
1 Week Ago 22:11
Where are the tits?
2 Weeks Ago 20:38
Last post by Sic Simon
2 Weeks Ago 21:33
Obama sends a letter.
10-19-17 22:42
Last post by Sic Simon
2 Weeks Ago 14:09
Put your liter of cola...
08-06-17 20:53
Last post by Dark Messiah
3 Weeks Ago 23:09
Online Users: 61
0 members and 61 guests
No Members online
Most users ever online was 1928, 06-09-15 at 19:20.
Powered by vBadvanced CMPS v3.0 RC2


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com

© 2006 - 2016 Dark Forum | About Dark Forum | Advertisers | Investors | Legal | A member of the Crowdgather Forum Community