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Old 08-14-03   #1
Kendra
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how i'm feeling tonight.

well tonight i'm feeling very very bored. i remembered that i have found some recorded tapes in my dresser. i decided to see what was being played on them. some of them i have found that one of them plays classical pianno music. then on another tape there was nothing but air being played. the rest of them were junk. i was curious and i didn't care what i was doing on my spare time. then i found my self another tape. i decided to listen to tubular bells. that song from the exorcist.

my mom is a sleep right know. i noticed that i haven't really seen my dad all day. he is still gone actually and its 10:36pm. but i don't really care where he is.

i also feel forgotten tonight.
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Old 08-14-03   #2
Kendra
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tonight i am a little fucking pissy. for one thing i really do not like secrets that people keep from me. that is one of my pet fucking peves.
besides if people do keep secrets from me. then that would make it even harder for me to start TRUSTING PEOPLE. i really do not like fucking secrets at all once so ever. so if people have something to tell me. then tell me and be straight with me about it. don't keep it hidden from me. cause if people do keep stuff hidden from then that is going to make worse. so this is a god dam mother fucking warning.
DO NOT KEEP SECRETS FROM ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i like people alot better if they don't keep things from me. cause that would throw my trusting thing to people off really fucking easily.
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Old 08-14-03   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shy shy
tonight i am a little fucking pissy. for one thing i really do not like secrets that people keep from me. that is one of my pet fucking peves.
besides if people do keep secrets from me. then that would make it even harder for me to start TRUSTING PEOPLE. i really do not like fucking secrets at all once so ever. so if people have something to tell me. then tell me and be straight with me about it. don't keep it hidden from me. cause if people do keep stuff hidden from then that is going to make it worse. so this is a god dam mother fucking warning.
DO NOT KEEP SECRETS FROM ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i like people alot better if they don't keep things from me. cause that would throw my trusting thing to people off really fucking easily.
well i'm kind of calm and still mad. but on another note. i wouldn't be so mad if we all worked out this secret that is being "kept" from me. if we could work out this little secret. i would feel much better and i wouldn't be as mad as i am right know. if people want me to trust them. cause people know that i don't trust people once so ever. then don't keep stuff from me, don't lie to me, don't back stab me, don't stand me up, and most of all don't keep secrets from me. i want people to be straight forward and honest with me as i am straight forward and honest with them. cause if you were straight forward and honest with me. then i won't be mad and i wouldn't give a shit. we would just have to talk about it is all.

this goes out for everyone that is in contact with the Shy shy.

man i should have been straight forword with someone tonight. but i was hurt that something was being kept from me and i didn't know what to say at the time and that made me talk less on the phone.

also if people start talking around about what is going on. mind your own god dam fucking buisness. this doesn't concern you at all. it just concerned that the people that i love to death. so keep your noses out of this. cause that would piss me off even more. is everyone clear about me? if so then good.
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Old 08-14-03   #4
Kendra
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man i still can't sleep. all the stuff that just happened to me and me finding out about it. its really taking me away from sleep. i have been going back and forworth to my computer all night. cause this stuff won't leave my head. i'm still saying that i would have been fine about it. if the people that i know and love to death would be straight with me about things and not keeping anything from me at all once so ever. since the people i know are keeping stuff from me. i find that to be a little chicken shit my self. besides one of them should know better. i have told this person before. that if they ever need to talk to me about anything at all. they can talk to me about anything they want and i won't get mad about it. but since none of them had the curticey to tell me. i am hurt and i was mad. but i'm not mad anymore but i'm still hurt. i knew that something like this was going to happen. i hope nothing comes in between with something that i have all ready. i'm not to great about shairing. i wanted to have something to my self. because to me that is way it should be. but i can tell that i am not going to have what i wanted. i don't even ask for much out of life either.

i know that everything i get into. or everything that i am interested in. or i think that i have something good going on for me. it would last for a month or stay good for a couple of days. then what do you know it all turns to shit for me.

oh well i'm just going to have a talk with the two people that i know about this. i'm not even going to get mad. i'm just going to be really cool about it the best way that i can. i hate how this is happening to me. if the people were in my own shoes. they wouldn't feel happy about it either. they would feel hurt.
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