Darkforum.com - Dark Stories, Dark Art, Poetry, Photography, Debates and Discussions
Home Register FAQ
Go Back   Darkforum.com - Dark Stories, Dark Art, Poetry, Photography, Debates and Discussions > Welcome > Socialize
Reload this Page a funny
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 06-24-02   #1
The Lost Spy
Face in the Mist
 
The Lost Spy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: illinois
Posts: 33
The Lost Spy
Credits: 882
a funny

Calling In Sick
Time to Call In Sick... I've Provided Excuses...
I can't come in to work today because I'll be stalking my previous boss, who fired me for not showing up for work. OK?

When I got up this morning, I took two Ex-lax in addition to my Prozac. I can't get off the john, but I feel good about it.

My mother-in-law has come back as one of the Undead and we must track her to her coffin to drive a stake through her heart and give her eternal peace. One day should do it.

I can't come to work today because the EPA has determined that my house is completely surrounded by wetlands and I have to arrange for helicopter transportation.

If it is all the same to you I won't be coming in to work. The voices told me to clean all the guns today.

I have a rare case of 48-hour projectile leprosy, but I know we have that deadline to meet....

I am stuck in the blood pressure machine down at Tom Thumb.

Yes, I seem to have contracted some attention-deficit disorder and, hey, how about them Skins, huh? So, I won't be able to, yes, could I help you? No, no, I'll be sticking with Sprint, but thank you for calling.

Constipation has made me a walking time bomb.

I just found out that I was switched at birth. Legally, I shouldn't come to work knowing my employee records may now contain false information.

The psychiatrist said it was an excellent session. He even gave me this jaw restraint so I won't bite things when I am startled.

The dog ate my car keys. We're going to hitchhike to the vet.
__________________

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


Recent Threads
Snakes are gonna take...
4 Weeks Ago 22:15
Last post by Baphamett
10 Hours Ago 17:32
If you've never heard of...
05-03-18 18:00
Last post by Baphamett
10 Hours Ago 17:28
Spent my last dollar on...
4 Days Ago 13:27
Last post by Baphamett
10 Hours Ago 17:26
I Got Da' News Baby!
1 Day Ago 21:10
Last post by Baphamett
1 Day Ago 21:10
Darkforum Youtube!
03-25-13 07:48
Last post by fahip
1 Week Ago 04:38
sup oezoem we mished you
12-13-17 21:02
Last post by Oezoem
2 Weeks Ago 21:11
What Are you Listening...
03-21-05 06:40
By Cucking Funt
Last post by Oezoem
3 Weeks Ago 23:41
So apparently it's World...
4 Weeks Ago 21:33
by thefr0g
Last post by thefr0g
3 Weeks Ago 22:25
Did Trump Trump Trump's...
3 Weeks Ago 18:47
Last post by Dark Messiah
3 Weeks Ago 21:30
Online Users: 69
0 members and 69 guests
No Members online
Most users ever online was 1928, 06-09-15 at 18:20.
Powered by vBadvanced CMPS v3.0 RC2


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com

© 2006 - 2016 Dark Forum | About Dark Forum | Advertisers | Investors | Legal | A member of the Crowdgather Forum Community