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Old 07-30-01   #141
Jobe
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Please don't cut yourself my friends.
I went through all that shit years ago and have the scars to prove. I found that in the long run the only person that got hurt was me and not the people that the pain was really aimed at. If you need help then talk to me (even if I have to give you my mobile number and become a 24 hour helpline!). Please don't hurt yourselves cos your worth more than that.
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Old 07-30-01   #142
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PBTH!!!!!!!!

JOBE X. I'M IN PAIN ALL THE TIME. HOW ELSE AM I SUPPOSE TO DEAL WITH MY PAIN?

PBTH!!!!!!!


THIS IS A PRETTY NASTY WORLD I LIVE IN...I DON'T KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE BUDDY!
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Old 07-30-01   #143
powder
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last night was a really bad night 4 me...i tryed my hardess not to cut myself but i just had to...its the only thing that makes me feel better.
i try to apear happy to ppl but i just dont see the point in pretending anymore
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Old 07-30-01   #144
*Gorgon_Medusa*
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yeah.

i cut.

i've tried to stop many times... just doesn't work.
i burn too.
i've been suicidal for about 2 years.

*sigh*
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Old 07-30-01   #145
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Quote:
Originally posted by powder
last night was a really bad night 4 me...i tryed my hardess not to cut myself but i just had to...its the only thing that makes me feel better.
i try to apear happy to ppl but i just dont see the point in pretending anymore
Its best not to pretend at all powder. The people around you should know how you feel and what you do in time anyway.
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Old 07-30-01   #146
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i always pretend im happy when im not...i dont want ppl to know im sad...i dont want to bring ppl down
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Old 07-30-01   #147
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If you dont let them see you like this then they wont be able to help you. Like any secret the longer it gos on for the worse it will be when they do find out. I dont know your situation fully powder but as i said before you can always talk to me.
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Old 08-01-01   #148
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i have the worst fucking erge to cut myself right now...i wouldnt be here whinning but i really need to keep myself busy so i dont...sry if this bugs anyone but when im writing it kinda keeps my mind off the whole thing.
i was ok...but then all of a sudden i was getting upset about something stupid and now i cant breath properly and i feel like im gonna pass out or something...what the hell is wronge with me
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Old 08-01-01   #149
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why do i hate life so much...why do i have to feel this way all the time
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~*..And..So After All That,The Soup Turned Into Jelly,The Chihuahua Found Its Family And The Rash Turned Out To Just Be Kool-Aid Stain That Wiped Off...And That Is Why I Hate Goats.*~



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Old 08-01-01   #150
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want to talk powder?
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Old 08-01-01   #151
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ill be ok
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Old 08-01-01   #152
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ok just checking i hope you feel better soon
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Old 08-01-01   #153
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thanx
seeya around laterz
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~*..And..So After All That,The Soup Turned Into Jelly,The Chihuahua Found Its Family And The Rash Turned Out To Just Be Kool-Aid Stain That Wiped Off...And That Is Why I Hate Goats.*~



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Old 08-01-01   #154
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Quote:
Originally posted by powder
i have the worst fucking erge to cut myself right now...i wouldnt be here whinning but i really need to keep myself busy so i dont...sry if this bugs anyone but when im writing it kinda keeps my mind off the whole thing.
i was ok...but then all of a sudden i was getting upset about something stupid and now i cant breath properly and i feel like im gonna pass out or something...what the hell is wronge with me
Doesn`t bug me at all powder. I know you`re going through a lot of shit back there.
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Old 08-01-01   #155
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awww...pain blows. damn it.
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Old 08-01-01   #156
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I started cutting when I was 14 (which was almost 2 years ago). I do it for two reasons: 1) To take out my frustrations and 2) to pierce the numbness that seems endless. After a while I started burning myself. I'd light a match and let it burn for a while. Then I'd blow it out and touch the glowing orange match-head to my skin. The pain would clear out everything in my mind. My anger, sadness, confusion...all of it would be purged for those few seconds of burning flesh. One time, right after I'd scratched myself up a bunch (I say scratched because it wasn't deep enough to be considered a cut) my mom saw my arms. I was wearing long sleaves, but when I reached up to get something out of the cabinet she saw them. She was more angry with me than anything else. She'd say stuff like "What do you think would happen if everytime I got mad I cut myself?" Which just made things worse. After that I took more precautions to hiding my marks. She never said anything more.

One of my best friends, a girl that's about my same age, is also a cutter. Her parents found out just recently and now she has to see a shrink once every two weeks. Since she can't cut anymore she told me that she's going to have to do something else, like stop eating. I'm really worried about her, but I don't know what I can do.

-Eric
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Old 08-01-01   #157
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Eric, so sorry to hear about this all. I don't know. Isn't there any other way for her to take out her pain? A pillow, punching bag, sports? Thats how I have been about a month without it. Sports, I save up all my pain and take it out on the court. It works for me. Also, I yell at people. That's a good way too. Well, sorry, I am probably not helping at all. Hope your friend is ok and I hope you are as well.
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Old 08-03-01   #158
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I'm with you little one, I got into martial arts and decided that someone else was gonna have to deal with my pain. I also go to the local basketball court when I feel the urge to inflict pain on myself and just go for it big time until I am so tired that I can't do anything bad to myself.

And hey Deshevil sorry if I upset you but I KNOW what it feels like and if you wanna talk or just get rid of some pain on me then feel free, all I want is for people not to go through the same shir I did for years and end up like me.
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Old 08-04-01   #159
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you play basketball??? Hope everyone is doing well. Its a month to this day since I last cut, well, unless you count checking to see if the blade was sharp, but I don't so. *yay* for me.
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Old 08-04-01   #160
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*sigh* my best friend was a cutter, burner, and a bruiser... since now she cant do any of those things because she gets checked.. but in certain places where she doesnt she cuts.. but not deep enough. now she is bulimic because she says it hurts when she does it and she told me and the guy at church it was about to get out of control but it wasnt yet and i just started bawling.. it ws horrible and i dont know what to do and she says she's gonna kill herself and the only reason she doesnt is me.. and that made me cry .. but she told me she was so scared and that she didnt wanna be like this anymore and she cant help it...

We both suffer huge anxiety attacks and just go crazy and start punching stuff and cutting ourselves and our parents dont believe we're depressed.. and that we need some medication.. but i told my mom i was depressed and she thought i was kidding and i wasnt... how can i tell her that she believes me?

it makes me sad just thinking about this... what should i do to help her and make sure she doenst throw up after she eats???

me and her both need help.. try and see what you can do for us please..

the only go0d part out of that night is the guy from church is really hot and he;s 19 and he hugged me and gave me his numbers just incase i needed them but otherwise
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