Darkforum.com - Dark Stories, Dark Art, Poetry, Photography, Debates and Discussions
Home Register FAQ
Go Back   Darkforum.com - Dark Stories, Dark Art, Poetry, Photography, Debates and Discussions > Discussions > Topic Discussions
Reload this Page GM v. Bill
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 03-03-03   #1
>FuckDoll<
hate hate hate
 
>FuckDoll<'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: SoCal
Posts: 11,272
>FuckDoll< will become famous soon enough
Credits: -2,014
GM v. Bill

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.

At a recent computer expo (COMDE, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon".

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the
door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10.You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
__________________
Don't Drink and Park. Accidents cause people.


To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #2
ArSiNiK
beer 12fl.oz (355ml)
 
ArSiNiK's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: redondo beach, ca
Posts: 29,624
ArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these parts
Credits: 28,466
good stuff...
__________________

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #3
dk123
Lost Soul
 
dk123's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Fish Bowl
Posts: 12,443
dk123 will become famous soon enoughdk123 will become famous soon enough
Credits: 262,974
oo...deja vu... i read this recently.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #4
Windigo
T.C.O.B
 
Windigo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Posts: 315
Windigo is an unknown quantity at this point
Credits: 5,735
again we waste Gargs server for something that has been posted previously. maybe someone should learn how to use the search function
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #5
Sybs
Unfolding
 
Sybs's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 15,913
Sybs is on a distinguished road
Credits: 202,466
temper temper..
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #6
dk123
Lost Soul
 
dk123's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Fish Bowl
Posts: 12,443
dk123 will become famous soon enoughdk123 will become famous soon enough
Credits: 262,974
maybe you should shut the fuck up.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #7
Billy the Kidd
Self Serving Hypocrite
Admin
 
Billy the Kidd's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Progressive HELL!!!
Posts: 19,435
Billy the Kidd will become famous soon enough
Credits: 418,233
actually Bill Gates was talkng about innovation and the lack thereof at GM, GM was just out to slander him and couldnt stick to the issue unfortunatly. Computers are sketchy a most, all of them crash. Macs included, im on a mac as we speak in my computer lab, and i hate it beyond belief.
__________________
Tolerance is a virtue of a dying civilzation. Aristotle
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #8
ArSiNiK
beer 12fl.oz (355ml)
 
ArSiNiK's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: redondo beach, ca
Posts: 29,624
ArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these parts
Credits: 28,466
gm never released this response to anyone, so there's no slander... just an internet joke.
__________________

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #9
Windigo
T.C.O.B
 
Windigo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Posts: 315
Windigo is an unknown quantity at this point
Credits: 5,735
you tell him Tozzy, that will really put him in his place
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #10
Sybs
Unfolding
 
Sybs's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 15,913
Sybs is on a distinguished road
Credits: 202,466
Quote:
Originally posted by Tozzy
maybe you should shut the fuck up.
me?
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #11
Billy the Kidd
Self Serving Hypocrite
Admin
 
Billy the Kidd's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Progressive HELL!!!
Posts: 19,435
Billy the Kidd will become famous soon enough
Credits: 418,233
Quote:
Originally posted by ArSiNiK
gm never released this response to anyone, so there's no slander... just an internet joke.
Bah!
__________________
Tolerance is a virtue of a dying civilzation. Aristotle
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #12
ArSiNiK
beer 12fl.oz (355ml)
 
ArSiNiK's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: redondo beach, ca
Posts: 29,624
ArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these parts
Credits: 28,466
http://www.snopes.com/humor/jokes/autos.htm
__________________

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #13
Duddy
Bacon
 
Duddy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Baltimore, MD
Posts: 8,029
Duddy
Credits: 128,079
Re: GM v. Bill

Quote:
Originally posted by >FuckDoll<


6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.


Hilarious.
__________________
Heyoooooooooooo
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #14
Spirit of the
Embracer Of The Dark
 
Spirit of the's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 416
Spirit of the
Credits: 6,971
hah. further proof that lobo is not I.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #15
dk123
Lost Soul
 
dk123's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Fish Bowl
Posts: 12,443
dk123 will become famous soon enoughdk123 will become famous soon enough
Credits: 262,974
no noy you sybelle. wouldnt say that to you.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-03-03   #16
Soulfull
Necessarily So
 
Soulfull's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: The last remaining bastion of sanity.
Posts: 2,937
Soulfull is on a distinguished road
Credits: 68,284
Cool!
__________________
Learn as if you were going to live forever. Live as if you were going to die tomorrow. --Mahatma Gandhi
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On


Recent Threads
Hey fr0g
4 Days Ago 01:49
Last post by Dark Messiah
5 Hours Ago 00:41
Anybody have...
1 Day Ago 21:02
Last post by thefr0g
7 Hours Ago 23:20
Gun control
11 Hours Ago 19:19
Last post by JOEBIALEK
11 Hours Ago 19:19
How Do I Access the...
03-17-07 21:48
Last post by Jezrygew
13 Hours Ago 16:38
Overflowing asylums
3 Weeks Ago 01:23
Last post by JeNn_DeViLz
2 Days Ago 19:27
Obama sends a letter.
4 Days Ago 21:42
Last post by Sic Simon
4 Days Ago 21:42
what surprised you today?
04-11-13 17:55
Last post by Sic Simon
4 Days Ago 21:19
Science Disproves...
11-01-10 14:38
by Pahu
Last post by Sic Simon
4 Days Ago 21:16
Whats your job?
11-20-07 14:57
Last post by Sic Simon
6 Days Ago 20:26
what have you eaten...
12-24-03 19:43
Last post by JeNn_DeViLz
1 Week Ago 10:09
Online Users: 51
0 members and 51 guests
No Members online
Most users ever online was 1928, 06-09-15 at 18:20.
Powered by vBadvanced CMPS v3.0 RC2


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com

© 2006 - 2016 Dark Forum | About Dark Forum | Advertisers | Investors | Legal | A member of the Crowdgather Forum Community