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Old 03-03-02   #21
BeautysDemise
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Well, I doubt it is Pyrric because as I said I have been having sex for six years.

Star: That is another reason I am not about to jump right up and have kids. I want to be able to go out when I want, and hang out with people, and do whatever. I am only nineteen in 12 days....((Hint hint...my birthday is coming up hehe.)) And Pyrric will be 20 in 17 days...So, no we're not mentally stable. I have a friend that has a two year old and a three month old. She is going through hell with both and it doesn't look like fun...So...I don't know. Plus, I don't want to be fatter than I am now hehe...
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Old 03-03-02   #22
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Quote:
Originally posted by haomdai
by the way duddy, your a stupid moron.
Is that the best you can do?
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Old 03-03-02   #23
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Well maybe. It depends on what you got. You just caught that one? Maybe you won't change your mind about kids. I think you might. I've seen your pictures and you are relatively young. Of course you don't have patience for kids, you're self centred.

and by the way... your title is wrong.. you're already an asshole.
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Old 03-03-02   #24
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Quote:
Originally posted by haomdai
It is definitly a personal choice however I would like to mention that there is no good or bad time to have children...
I disagree - I think there is definitely a bad time to have kids.

My parents and plentiful others that I see, should never have had kids when they did. I know it is easy to say it when I have no maternal instincts of my own right now, but I truly believe that you have to be very careful when deciding to have children.

Too many people I know have well and truly screwed up their kids mentally as they weren't 'ready' to have them. Truth be told, this is the main reason I don't want to have any.

I am not saying that BeautyDemise is not ready, I am simply saying that your mindset is far more important than the financial setting etc etc. I believe some people should never have kids, no matter what role instinct plays in it.
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Old 03-03-02   #25
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I KNOW I am not ready to have kids at this point in my life. I was just seeing how old many of you were and/or your parents were. I got a lot of insight and this thread helped me see I am not ready...Some of the questions posed...especially by Star helped me see that. I still want to party too much...
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Old 03-03-02   #26
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Quote:
Originally posted by XBeautysDemiseX
Well, I doubt it is Pyrric because as I said I have been having sex for six years.

Star: That is another reason I am not about to jump right up and have kids. I want to be able to go out when I want, and hang out with people, and do whatever. I am only nineteen in 12 days....((Hint hint...my birthday is coming up hehe.)) And Pyrric will be 20 in 17 days...So, no we're not mentally stable. I have a friend that has a two year old and a three month old. She is going through hell with both and it doesn't look like fun...So...I don't know. Plus, I don't want to be fatter than I am now hehe...
Hey...I hear ya. Sorry about your friend...it would suck if your kids were nothing more than a burden. My parents loooove to babysit and my sister in law too so...we pretty much can do the weekend thing but...I rather enjoy my child. You have plenty of time girl...hell when I was 19-25 kids were the furthest thing from my mind...I didn't even think I would live past 30 then.
We had a neighbor that was about your age too...her man was in and out of jail and she was like this poor little girl living with grandma struggeling to balance her social life, drug habbit and children...it was probably the saddest thing I ever saw in my life.
She lost her kids and she's in rehab now.
From what I do know about the two of you (take no offense in anyway shape or form PLEASE) You'd be better off just enjoying your lives and working on stability for your future and not worrying about kids at all right now. My mom wasn't afraid to tell me the same at your age...not that she had anything to worry about...I was ANTI ANTI children back then.
When and if it's meant to happen...it will happen...ready or not.
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Old 03-03-02   #27
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Quote:
Originally posted by haomdai
Well maybe. It depends on what you got. You just caught that one? Maybe you won't change your mind about kids. I think you might. I've seen your pictures and you are relatively young. Of course you don't have patience for kids, you're self centred.

and by the way... your title is wrong.. you're already an asshole.


Obviously you know nothing about me, because then you would realize that I'm about as far from self-centered as a person can get. In fact, I'm too nice. And children need a strong male role model, not someone that bends over backwards to try his hardest to make everyone happy, and gets screwed over all the time.
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Old 03-04-02   #28
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Star: No, you're right. We do need to straighten shit out...I have a plan to own a house by the time I am 21 or so...so I will be in college then too. So, I am content to party and hang out and whatever for now. And on that line, let's have a party at my house!
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Old 03-04-02   #29
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Quote:
Originally posted by Duddy




Obviously you know nothing about me, because then you would realize that I'm about as far from self-centered as a person can get. In fact, I'm too nice. And children need a strong male role model, not someone that bends over backwards to try his hardest to make everyone happy, and gets screwed over all the time.

I wuv you anyway *huggles her Duddy*
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Old 03-04-02   #30
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Okay tears of black, i do agree with you on that one. being mentally prepared is an asset to having children. however i meant, there is no good or bad time to have children because i believe that if you end up pregnant there are always reasons to not have them no matter how well set up a person is mentally, financially, educationally, etc, etc. Even the happiest, loving, most stable married couple on earth could come up with a few reasons not to have children.
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Old 03-04-02   #31
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Re: Question about having children...

Quote:
Originally posted by XBeautysDemiseX
I have often said I was not having children until I was out of college and had a steady job. I don't know if this would be a good choice or not. For obvious reasons it is...but do you think I would be too old? I would be about 27 or so by the time I was out and had that steady damn job...Just looking for some insight here....


How long did most of you wait?
As soon as I had everything planned it out perfectly. I wouldn't want anything to happen wrong.
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Old 03-05-02   #32
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Quote:
Originally posted by haomdai
Okay tears of black, i do agree with you on that one. being mentally prepared is an asset to having children. however i meant, there is no good or bad time to have children because i believe that if you end up pregnant there are always reasons to not have them no matter how well set up a person is mentally, financially, educationally, etc, etc. Even the happiest, loving, most stable married couple on earth could come up with a few reasons not to have children.
I hate to harbor on about it, but I think being mentally prepared is more than an asset, I think it is an essential requirement.

Even if a pregnancy is unplanned, your mental state can't always change dramatically into one that is healthy to raise kids in. It is for that reason that I had an abortion several years ago. I do not regret my decision in the slightest, even though the whole concept is generally a sad one.
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Old 03-05-02   #33
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Quote:
Originally posted by Tearsofblack


I hate to harbor on about it, but I think being mentally prepared is more than an asset, I think it is an essential requirement.

Even if a pregnancy is unplanned, your mental state can't always change dramatically into one that is healthy to raise kids in. It is for that reason that I had an abortion several years ago. I do not regret my decision in the slightest, even though the whole concept is generally a sad one.
Fair play, it takes a strong person to make that decision and you obviously did what was right for you

I think you should have kids when you are ready for them too being prepared is always a requiremnent but in real life it rarely happens like that. My sister was 19 when she had her son, it was a surprise and an accident but having us (her family) around her we have all pitched in to help out when she was a bit overwhelmed and we have a beautiful little 5 year old running about now But children aren't for everyone and I have respect for those who do not want them as I am unsure as to whether I want kids or not myself...I think I am too selfish right now, there are too many things that I want to do first, places to go parties to host etc... Pyrric and Beauty, why not wait a while to get your partying done and straighten out what you need to, I think there is an upper age limit on having kids...but I aslo believe you two are far from it just yet. Just do it when you are ready, and if it happens before you are ready and you decide to keep the child, just make sure that you try your hardest (as i have no doubt you will) and everything should turn out fine.
As for the medical side Beauty, both of you should really get tested to see if you can have kids...you said yourself you ahve been having sex for 6 years without getting pregnant, so please check it out...like someone said it could be anything or nothing but it is better to be safe than sorry

Whatever you decide and whatever happens I wish the best to both of you, take care. Love SilverNymph XXxx
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