Darkforum.com - Dark Stories, Dark Art, Poetry, Photography, Debates and Discussions
Home Register FAQ
Go Back   Darkforum.com - Dark Stories, Dark Art, Poetry, Photography, Debates and Discussions > Welcome > Socialize
Reload this Page 10 ways to be the funny guy at a party
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 11-20-01   #1
ArSiNiK
beer 12fl.oz (355ml)
 
ArSiNiK's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: redondo beach, ca
Posts: 29,624
ArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these partsArSiNiK is infamous around these parts
Credits: 28,466
10 ways to be the funny guy at a party

1) bring a container of red food coloring, and pour it into your
friend's beer bottle - whisper to everybody how you've heard he has a
venereal disease, and wait for him to go to the bathroom - when he
pisses, the food coloring will shoot right through him and turn his
piss blood red - listen for him to scream, and laugh when he comes out

2) tell everyone how much you can drink while you chug four or five
warm martinis, then projectile vomit on the wall and wipe your mouth
on some woman's dress

find the only bathroom in the house, go in and lock the door for
half an hour - shit in the toilet, then stuff the bowl with toilet
paper and flush - when you open the door, tell everyone waiting
outside that you have the stomach flu and cough - don't cover your
mouth

4) if the host has a cat, find out where the litter box is and take a
shit - scatter a handful of litter on the turd, then go tell everyone
and show them - keep repeating "big fucking cat"

5) talk about how badly your asshole itches, then take off your
pants, sit down, and drag your ass across the carpet - make muttering
references to the host and his penchant for young boys

6) when no one is looking, go upstairs and root through the dirty
laundry - take a pair of the wife's or daughter's panties, and put
them in your pocket - show them to your friends and let them sniff
the crotch - when they notice the pussy smell, tell them "they
should, his wife/daughter left them at my house last night"

7) look through the drawers until you find a camera - take the camera
into the bathroom and lock the door, then stick the plunger on the
mirror - slide the plunger handle into your ass, then take a picture
- be sure to hide your face - several weeks will go by before they
develop the film, at which point your host will appreciate your
inventiveness

8) drink several cocktails, then piss yourself - keep interrupting
conversations by rudely bumping into people and asking them "do you
know where the bathroom is?" - when walking past couples, mutter to
the men "herpes" and "fucking whore"

9) place a fancy bowl of canned dog food on the table between the
party mix and crackers - watch the guest's faces as they eat the dog
food and ask them how they like the fois gras, then laugh at them and
tell the host - when he says "I didn't put out any fois gras", say
"hmmm, that's strange" and walk away

10) jerk off into your hand and hold onto it for about ten minutes,
telling everyone you have a secret - tell your host to lean close,
then smear it on his face - say something like "I've been wanting to
do that for weeks." - then kick him in the nuts and give him a
bearhug.
__________________

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-21-01   #2
doebathory
the poet
 
doebathory's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: well the estate agent said it was a semi/det. des. res. in need of some work but to me it looks like a complete sht. hle.
Posts: 5,564
doebathory is on a distinguished road
Credits: 185,622
*laughing her way to a mini-orgasm*



11. tell everyone you've proved the theorum of perpetual motion - N.B. only guys can do this (without an extraordinary amount of acrobatics). put several drinking straws together to make one long one. put one end in the punchbowl and the other in your mouth. put your dick in the punchbowl. start drinking. keep drinking.


__________________
Fuck you and the horse you rode in on.

No...wait...I take that back...I have no problem with the horse you rode in on.
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-22-01   #3
neonwraith
Voice of Unerring Reason
 
neonwraith's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: In the Cold Harsh North
Posts: 3,408
neonwraith
Credits: 108,935
no4 is sheer genius

Neon
__________________
"I've oft been told by learned friars
That wishing and the crime were one
And heaven punishes desires
As much as if the deed were done.

If wishing damns us, you and I
Are damned to all our hearts content.
Come then we may at least enjoy
Some pleasure for our punishment..."

Sir Thomas More
is Offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


Recent Threads
Science Disproves...
11-01-10 14:38
by Pahu
Last post by Pahu
19 Hours Ago 09:06
Whats your job?
11-20-07 14:57
Last post by Sic Simon
1 Day Ago 20:26
what surprised you today?
04-11-13 17:55
Last post by thefr0g
2 Days Ago 14:31
what have you eaten...
12-24-03 19:43
Last post by JeNn_DeViLz
2 Days Ago 10:09
Darkforum Youtube!
03-25-13 07:48
Last post by JeNn_DeViLz
2 Days Ago 09:32
vote or die
1 Week Ago 01:56
Last post by JeNn_DeViLz
2 Days Ago 09:20
vote or die
1 Week Ago 02:02
Last post by Sic Simon
4 Days Ago 21:45
long Sunday
3 Weeks Ago 18:00
by DaxterK
Last post by Sic Simon
1 Week Ago 01:46
BATH SALT ZOMBIES
12-04-13 11:20
Last post by Sic Simon
1 Week Ago 23:34
I'm drinking Vodka,...
09-02-17 23:28
by thefr0g
Last post by JeNn_DeViLz
1 Week Ago 22:44
Online Users: 55
0 members and 55 guests
No Members online
Most users ever online was 1928, 06-09-15 at 18:20.
Powered by vBadvanced CMPS v3.0 RC2


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com

© 2006 - 2016 Dark Forum | About Dark Forum | Advertisers | Investors | Legal | A member of the Crowdgather Forum Community