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Old 07-13-05   #21
Kain424
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I have changed up my Horror Movie thing, but basically I thought that movie was a comedy. To be sure, it had certain elements that would have gone in my "Thriller" category, but mostly I thought it was funny.

As to the girl thing, we've become kinda work-buddies, because I work with her. I told her about everything and she just thought it was funny. So we laughed about it and moved on.
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Old 07-13-05   #22
Kain424
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Wednesday.

So I got a letter from another member (and Moderator) from this site, Jordyn. Actually, it was a Private Message, but it's the same thing if you ask me.

She's coming up to Montana with her husband or something and was wondering if I wanted to meet her. Of course, since Montana is around, if not bigger, than the size of Germany, this could present a problem. Fortunately, she is going through a place called Dillon, which is in the south-west part of Montana... I also live in the south-west part of the state, near a city called Bozeman, to the north-east of Dillon.

I don't know when Jordyn is coming up here, how long they are staying, or even where they are heading. But that would be cool to meet another member of DarkForum. To match a person with a personality.
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Old 07-30-05   #23
Kain424
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Saturday... the day after Arnold Schwarzenegger's birthday.

Well, it looks like Jordyn and I aren't going to meet. But that's ok. She called and told me, regrettably, that she wouldn't be able to make it. Well, I know what she sounds like.

At the time, I was driving home from going and buying a new tire from a local salvage yard. I had picked up a 9-inch metal spike the day before that had wasted my tire. So I didn't get to work and am therefore short on cash anyhow.

Also to report, Harry and I have both been denied the aprtment we applied for. By some fucked up calculation of theirs, we actually make more money than is allowed for people to live there. Oh fuckin' well.

Tonight, a friend of mine called and told me that he was having a party over at his place and that I should come over after work. Well, I drove over there and on the way I saw a couple police cruisers fly by and head toward his place. Out of instinct I called him and told him that police were coming towards his place and (since he is under 21 and definitely drinking) that he should run or hide.

I pulled across the street in time to see the cops walking to his house. I watched as they entered the place and waited for a while before leaving my vehicle and entering the house myself. There were a lot of people over there but I did not see my friend, to whom the place belonged. After a while, the police left, no one charged with anything. Apparently there had been a noise disturbance or something. I found my friend a bit later, hiding in the crawlspace with some girl.

A couple of people I knew who had been at another party I'd also attended bitched at me and told be not to act so belligerent to the police anymore... at least while they were there. Ass holes... they think that the cops would give them harsher punishments if someone acts up. Well, we're all over 21... there's not much that they could do. These guys are just being pussies. I fucking hate people.
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Old 01-14-08   #24
Kain424
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Monday.

I can't believe I'm back here posting. But I think that it pays to look back and look in.

You (whoever "you" are) wouldn't believe all of the shit that's happened since that last post.

The week after that night, I went to another party at the same house. In doing so, I met a girl. To be truthful, she was being a spiteful bitch to those around her, who were doing nothing but kissing her ass. I, still angry over not getting the apartment, decided that I would take it out on her (whom we shall now refer to as Tay). A couple hours later, we are on the hood of my Jeep, talking about our lives... yeah, the asshole thing still attracts the girls.

A couple of weeks after that and we are dating. I ended up buying a crappy little trailer and Tay and I fixed it up very nice, but she didn't move in with me. Actually, Harry moved in with me. Pretty sweet, eh?

At my job, I get promoted to manager, I by a new car, I see tons of movies, read plenty of books, an am working out regularly. And, of course, there is lots of sex. Tay is the best ever.

The weeks turn to months, and then a year. I don't have the time to be posting on the internet anymore at this point simply because I am occupied with love, work, hobbies, and... well, frankly, I'm just not angry enough to be posting.

Tay went with me on a seven-hour drive to my family reunion. My family loved her. That was a first. Especially since she was black and Puerto Rican. But oh well. My faily's always been a bit of a mix.

It was a great time. It took months for us to have our first fight. I don't even remember what it was about, but it's not really important. What is important is that we were able to make up. However, I remember her going into a different stage mid-2006, where she stopped being so open with me. Near the beginning of December, she found out that her mother was going to move to Texas, and she was going to go with her. I was devastated.

Again, the time flew, but now in a more horrifying and terribly fast way. And then, there I was... standing outside of her house, helping her move shit into a U-Haul. Feeling like an utter jack-ass. She kissed me one last time, and then I was driving away, punching my steering wheel like it was my sad, pathetic self that had let her go.

After that, things were dark. We tried to keep in contact, starting out fine, her sending me naughty pics through my e-mail and having long conversations on the phone. But then it was one missed call, then two, then avoided calls, and the cold, lonely nights wondering why she wasn't calling like she said she would. Of course, then there began the jealousy. I tried kicking it away, but it kept coming back until it exploded into senseless argument, an unchecked anger, finally exploding at her like a negative orgasm of dark frustration that perhaps she intended or would never understand. We were over.

I was angry and alone again, and nothing was helping. I was angry at my family, my friends, and myself. And this was still in January.

Valentine's Day. She called me up, and then we were together again. Not in person, but tightly connected. We talked a lot, like we were happy. And we were. Shit, there was even phone sex. She was great.

September. Tay was coming here! I was so excited, but also hesitant. We had recently had a couple arguments on the phone and our conversations had become a tad stilted and lazy. I told myself that things would be better once she got here. She came out to Montana... she stayed at my home, in my bed. But I was stuck cabbing her around to see everyone but me. I hated the fact that I felt so selfish and jealous.

Then she began getting rides from her friends. She would come home late at night (actually, early in the morning), well after I had gone to bed. I would hear her come in at night, smell her reeking of cigarettes and whatever else she had been into. I would sit and stew in my anger, not wanting to upset her with discussion of my own needs or her increasingly distant and erratic behavior.

...Or maybe I was just afraid of her.

Whatever. It wasn't long before she noticed my lack of enthusiasm with her. But I didn't want to get into it. She picked up a picture of herself from my dresser and smashed it onto the floor. Glass went everywhere, and before I knew it, I had sprung up from my bed and was screaming at her to get out of my fucking house. Everything came out, and I saw her scared for, perhaps, the first time ever. She was gone a couple of days later... back to Texas.

I wanted to die. I had the gun, the booze. Every day I thought about the last two wasted years and my useless self. And then, down the grapevine, I began hearing stories. Tales of Tay fucking around with other guys while she was up here for that week. It stung like nothing else could ever have done.

I still hear these things, but I haven't heard her voice in months. Perhaps she was actually an awful person all along. Or maybe it's me. Maybe I've done nothing but shit for life and this is what I get.

Now... now I'm still hanging on, but I want to die. I was so happy once, and now I'm a fuckload lower than I was with my last post in here. I guess that we shall see.

Anyhow, I've got work in a few hours and I haven't slept. Fuck.
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Old 01-29-08   #25
Kain424
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Tuesday.

Man. I just can't go two seconds without fucking something up.

So I met this guy at my work who is a bit younger than I and we kinda became friends. Not the closest of friends, mind you, but the kind that generally get along. He's been to my house a few times even. We shall call him Squire (I have my reasons).

Anyhow, I also kinda became friends with his girl. She is a nice thing, blond and blue-eyed, short and light-skinned. Not my type. We shall call her Smiles.

So Squire and Smiles get on the outs during this time and I, being older I guess, somehow end up speaking to and consoling all sorts of advice. Why they come to me I am not really sure, but like I said, it may be because I am older.

Turns out, Squire's got his own little thing going, trying to get with one girl, setting up another, and then still trying to hold onto Smiles. Somehow, and you've gotta trust me on this, Squire's still a pretty decent guy. Just being young and dumb.

Eventually, this shit blows up a bit and he loses Smiles and the other chick. Though it seems that he wasn't all that interested in the other chick anyway (who by this time is also talking to me... yeah, talk about a conflict of interest).

Weeks go by and I start talking to Smiles quite a bit more. We become pretty good friends and then it hits me: this girl is fucking awesome! I always end up with these snotty little bitches who treat me like garbage and here is this nice girl who is totally cool just hanging out with me.

But then there I am conflicted... Squire is a friend and so is she. I figure that it's best just not to say or do anything. Smiles starts coming over more to watch movies and I'm fine with that because I just want to be around her. Then one night after she goes home I get this text:

Do you like me?


Everything I hoped and dreaded in four fucking words. I told her I would talk about it with her the next day.

So we meet for coffee and whatnot the following day, and I am nervous as hell. I face my fears and tell her that while it is true that I hold feelings for her, we cannot go on because of our relationship to Squire. Yeah, I was already slapping myself but I still hung out with her.

Then she stayed late at my house and I let her sleep in my bed... I didn't sleep. The next night she did it again, but when I woke her the next morning, it became complicated. She had to leave to go to a concert that night and I told her that I would talk to Squire.

That night I hung out with Squire and was twice as nervous as I was with Smiles the other day. It got into the morning of the following day and I decided I would tell him.

...Unfortunately, he was very strongly against the notion of me having anything to do with his ex, and we continued to discuss the issue at length. He asked me if her and I's attraction might not just be a sort of rebound for the both of us... I admitted to the possibility. Looking back, I now feel that this was his own way of gaining the upper hand in the conversation, but I told him that I would talk to Smiles the following day. Squire couldn't wait and called her then. He had her crying and I ended up leaving.

The next few days were an awful mess. It was a stand-off, her wanting to sever ties with him, I wanting a relationship with her but without damaging the one with him, and him wanting her to remain forever single just in case he left his new girlfriend.

Smiles caved, then so did I. But now I feel this has done nothing but ruin everything. She wants to remain my friend and I am stuck wanting again. I should have just said "no" to her text message.

How do I always manage to fuck this shit up so bad?
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Old 09-23-08   #26
Harry Hard-On
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And then you cried, you cried like Nancy Carrigan. You Ninny Bitch
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