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05-11-07
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#1
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Proud papa
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 5,535
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Anyone Know how this goes?
Alright, I need some info here. I am about to go though something called and ICPC to get custody of my daughter, and I kinda need to know what to really expect, since I can't get much information out of the social worker in Nevada, and I can only find information about it on the net concerning child adoption, not transfer of custody. I want to improve my chances as much as I possibly can, and the only way to do that is to get more info. I have at most 30 days to prepare from today, if I am lucky, and I am off to a bad start, cause I am back being unemployed yet again, and no one wants to even grant me an interview, but that is something only I can do anything about.
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Farewell Little Brother, You Shall be Missed 1989-2007 I'm gonna kick you ass for this though
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05-11-07
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#2
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Self Serving Hypocrite
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Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Progressive HELL!!!
Posts: 19,441
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I don't know from personal experience, but be prepared to be anally raped. Men don't get custody of their children. Thats it. Not unless the mother is a drug addict.
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Tolerance is a virtue of a dying civilzation. Aristotle
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05-11-07
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#3
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DF's Dirty 'ol Man
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Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Hiding in the shadows
Posts: 11,229
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Hmm, bring anything and everything that can show you to be a "FIT" parent to start with..
Tax returns to prove you've had income.
Rental/Lease copies to prove you have a stable residence.
Be prepared to fire off a list of a dozen people who can tell them about you.
*note: if everything sounds even remotely scripted; they won't believe them! and be sure that at least one person will say something negative about you other than drugs, alcohol, non-employment, temperament..
Bank records to show you have steady income.
Utility bills.. To show you pay your bills on time!
School records ( if you have some ) to show that you tried/are trying to forward yourself.
Pictures of where the child will be staying. Including, but in no way limited to, where she will be sleeping. ( and that better be a different bedroom from yours! )
Tell them about where you plan to purchase, have purchased ( again receipts ) bedding, clothing, furniture, toys, educational material ( bonus points for interactive materials ) anything dealing with playtime/educational time should be mostly non-computer/video. and should involve your help/contribution (depending on her age ).
Hmmm, thats the TIP of the iceberg you're headed for..
If you think the IRS can be tough.. Wait till you deal personally with any child services people!! Thats when you start praying for an audit instead of a home visit from them!!
Don't dress in a suit coat unless you're seeing the judge. Shirt and Tie with casual business slacks would be better. OH, find some female to make sure they are co-ordinated!! Not too stuffy, but not too casual either.
Hmm, bring photo's of you and your friends/family.
OH! and that list of references i mentioned.... Have names, addresses, phone numbers, ages ( it might be asked ), alternate phone #'s to show how well you actually know them. And memorize simple things about them like hair color, eye color, height, ext. And what they like to do.. KNOW how involved they might be with your daughter should you get her.
Who are your emergency contacts? How hard would it be for them to drop everything, if something happened to you, to get your daughter at a moments notice?
Well, thats a start.. Think hard about what you might want to know about the person you would have raise your daughter if something were to happen to you.
think about every detail you would want to know about them.. Then prepare for that, and you have a basic idea of what might be asked of you..
Hope this helps..
__________________
Beware the ex's.. They ARE out to get you...
Nice guys finish last
It isn't just a saying.. It's a fact of life!
Those things that produced your ex......you know, the bitchmakers! Metagion
If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
You're not who you are, you're only what other people think you are
Your more Delusional than you think I am! {Duck Dodgers}
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05-12-07
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#4
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Proud papa
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 5,535
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Well I got something in the mail yesterday stating some of the criteria I am gonna have to meet, and I talked with the lady in Nevada again. According to the packet I have to go under go a mental eval, a parental skills eval, and have a home study done, as well as have a job, and a stable home environment(they want me to have my own place instead of splitting the cost of the house I am currently at with my sister). From what she has said I get my daughter if I meet all those standards
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Farewell Little Brother, You Shall be Missed 1989-2007 I'm gonna kick you ass for this though
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05-12-07
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#5
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DF's Dirty 'ol Man
Admin
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Hiding in the shadows
Posts: 11,229
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Then what are you waiting for??
Get the job, get the evals and See if you name being on the lease with your sister counts..
Glad you don't have to go through hell like some people i know have.. Thats where i got the partial list from..
__________________
Beware the ex's.. They ARE out to get you...
Nice guys finish last
It isn't just a saying.. It's a fact of life!
Those things that produced your ex......you know, the bitchmakers! Metagion
If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
You're not who you are, you're only what other people think you are
Your more Delusional than you think I am! {Duck Dodgers}
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is Offline
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05-12-07
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#6
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Self Serving Hypocrite
Admin
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Progressive HELL!!!
Posts: 19,441
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nox noctis Umbra
Well I got something in the mail yesterday stating some of the criteria I am gonna have to meet, and I talked with the lady in Nevada again. According to the packet I have to go under go a mental eval, a parental skills eval, and have a home study done, as well as have a job, and a stable home environment(they want me to have my own place instead of splitting the cost of the house I am currently at with my sister). From what she has said I get my daughter if I meet all those standards
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Amazing, I bet the mother doesn't have to jump through all those hoops.
__________________
Tolerance is a virtue of a dying civilzation. Aristotle
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05-14-07
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#7
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Proud papa
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 5,535
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Your right billy, she has to jump through more. She has to have the mental health eval, and the parental skills eval, take a parenting course, get possible mental help, get a job where she isn't working nights, be tested for substance abuse, get a three bedroom apartment, since she has two sons as well, and her boyfriend has to have a background check done. As to what I am waiting for Tiggs, I am waiting for an interview, instead of a run around, and for the state of Iowa to contact me. And I am two months behind in the support payments I am supposed to be paying and have to wait for Iowa on that one too. Fuckers. The reason why this is being so easy is that the state laws of nevada are based around the welfare of the child, and they believe that everything should be done to have the involvment of the parents, if, and only if that is proven to not be possible, then you get to be bent over.
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Farewell Little Brother, You Shall be Missed 1989-2007 I'm gonna kick you ass for this though
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05-15-07
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#8
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DF's Dirty 'ol Man
Admin
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Hiding in the shadows
Posts: 11,229
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Heh, I've been bent over by Ca. If i ever have another kid.. I think i'll move to Nevada first..
__________________
Beware the ex's.. They ARE out to get you...
Nice guys finish last
It isn't just a saying.. It's a fact of life!
Those things that produced your ex......you know, the bitchmakers! Metagion
If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
You're not who you are, you're only what other people think you are
Your more Delusional than you think I am! {Duck Dodgers}
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is Offline
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05-15-07
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#9
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Self Serving Hypocrite
Admin
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Progressive HELL!!!
Posts: 19,441
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nox noctis Umbra
Your right billy, she has to jump through more. She has to have the mental health eval, and the parental skills eval, take a parenting course, get possible mental help, get a job where she isn't working nights, be tested for substance abuse, get a three bedroom apartment, since she has two sons as well, and her boyfriend has to have a background check done. As to what I am waiting for Tiggs, I am waiting for an interview, instead of a run around, and for the state of Iowa to contact me. And I am two months behind in the support payments I am supposed to be paying and have to wait for Iowa on that one too. Fuckers. The reason why this is being so easy is that the state laws of nevada are based around the welfare of the child, and they believe that everything should be done to have the involvment of the parents, if, and only if that is proven to not be possible, then you get to be bent over.
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I seriously doubt she has to jump through more.
__________________
Tolerance is a virtue of a dying civilzation. Aristotle
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05-15-07
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#10
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Proud papa
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 5,535
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O.k. that packet they sent me telling me how this is all going to go had a list of benchmarks, she had 7 to meet, I have one. Who has to jump through more hoops? And Tiggs I know how you feel. When my daughter was first born, I got bent over by Utah, and when you say the term "father's rights" they either give you a look that says "What the hell is that?" or the same look you would get if you said goddammit in the middle of a church. They wouldn't even talk to me.
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Farewell Little Brother, You Shall be Missed 1989-2007 I'm gonna kick you ass for this though
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05-15-07
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#11
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DF's Dirty 'ol Man
Admin
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Hiding in the shadows
Posts: 11,229
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unless your a polygamist.. Then they wonder how many kids you have..
But.... If your a good church going member who's tithings are up to date. And she's left the church.. You get the gold mine, and she gets the shaft.. LOL
__________________
Beware the ex's.. They ARE out to get you...
Nice guys finish last
It isn't just a saying.. It's a fact of life!
Those things that produced your ex......you know, the bitchmakers! Metagion
If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
You're not who you are, you're only what other people think you are
Your more Delusional than you think I am! {Duck Dodgers}
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is Offline
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05-19-07
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#12
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Proud papa
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 5,535
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Eh to hell with the mormons, I don't have to deal with them now anyways. I just wish I had a way now to tell at what point this is all being processed at. Its supposed to be done within 60 days from when the state of Iowa gets the request, but who knows when that will be
__________________
Farewell Little Brother, You Shall be Missed 1989-2007 I'm gonna kick you ass for this though
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05-19-07
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#13
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DF's Dirty 'ol Man
Admin
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Hiding in the shadows
Posts: 11,229
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There should be a contact in Iowa. Nevada should know who this is.. ask them..
__________________
Beware the ex's.. They ARE out to get you...
Nice guys finish last
It isn't just a saying.. It's a fact of life!
Those things that produced your ex......you know, the bitchmakers! Metagion
If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
You're not who you are, you're only what other people think you are
Your more Delusional than you think I am! {Duck Dodgers}
|
is Offline
|
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05-21-07
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#14
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Proud papa
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 5,535
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There is, they have officies in every state. I can get the number off of the web. I figure give them one more week and then call. I am gonna have to call the state anyways to find out what is going on with the court ordered support. Being three months behind is not exactly an enjoyable idea, especially when its because the state is taking their sweet ass time with the matter. But if they wanted to to withold the support from my paychecks, they'd be all over it like shit on velcro.
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Farewell Little Brother, You Shall be Missed 1989-2007 I'm gonna kick you ass for this though
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