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Old 03-21-08   #2
RavensGuy
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The Chubby Philosphophy?

The Chubby Philosophy??????

Found this while surfing the net...makes me wonder if it applies to women as well, do they really sleep with us fat guys just to make us feel "special"? Either way, man or woman, you're just a big fat cunt if you do this.

Chubby Chasers was founded in the beliefs and ideals of humping fat chicks. Now we all dream of growing up and marrying a supermodel, an actress, a beautiful mermaid, whatever. And some of us do eventually get lucky. But until that happens, any self respecting guy is really just out trying to get laid. We get horny and begin to settle in life. And many of us begin to get desperate when we fall into a dry spell. We start thinking twice about women who we normally would pay no attention to. This is where alcohol comes in. At two in the morning, when all the fly honey's have all been swooped up, and nothing remains but that stringy-haired walrus in the corner. We start to think, "Hey, she's not so bad, she's kinda cute when I squint." Now at this point of the night we can hardly tell the difference between the computer and the kitchen sink, and then our animal appetite starts to take over. The internal hunger to procreate that makes every male howl at the moon and behave in otherwise irrational behavior. Well, to put things in modern day terms, we men become willing to do anything possible in order to establish our manhood. Including, yes, chasing chubby women. Now normally we would never resort to such desperate behavior for fear of humiliation amongst our peers, but desperate times call for desperate measures. There are several reasons why we men are willing to aim so low, and although alcohol is the primary endorphin to our behavior, it is not the only reason. For one, opportunity. She is there, you are there, and both are in a desperate and horny frame of mind. But more importantly, she wants it just as much as you do, probably more. You see, fat girls are like wolves. They never know when they are gonna eat next. Remember fellas, you may be in a slump, but her entire love life is a depressing, self-wallowing pitfall of self hate and chocolate. So any cheesy line you may get rejected with at the local tavern on a hot chick, is all this female counterpart needs in order for you to slip into the warmy goodness of her skin folds. ANY attention at all is the key to her gooey, rolling curves. And of course being a warm-blooded, sperm producing young male yourself, your chances are looking pretty damn good buddy. So rather than degrade your friend for breaking out of his hump slump with a hungry hungry hippo female companion, this website is dedicated to embracing what we have all experienced. Many guilty young men want to hide the fact or deny from their friends that they too have gotten so drunk as to sleep with Shamu, because they are ashamed or embarrassed. So we are here to tell you that, "We've been there bro. And it's okay." So with that, you should feel no shame, but rather glory. Call it charity if you will, whatever makes you feel good about it. You made that hefty sweetheart's night for one enchanting evening. Just know that you are not alone.

Wow...just wow...so apparently, to the people who follow this line of thinking, "chubby" people, are nothing more than just a hump and dump, a Tom Leykis way of thinking.

And here I was thinking that the reason I wasn't in a relationship, or anything else for that matter, was for the simple fact that everyone on earth was taken. WELL SHIT! HOOK ME UP BROTHA!

I wonder if anyone has ever heard of a chubby, chubby chaser? I.E. a fat person going after another fat person...hmmm...what defines a person as fat anyway?

Is it all the rolls in our midsection? The large thighs? The occasional cankle or two?

See, to me, there are two kinds of fat people, there are fat people ( overweight, chubby, hefty, etc.)

THEN there are FAT PEOPLE. The kind of people that don't care how large they get, don't care about their looks, I'm talking about the ones that you might mistake for a carnival ride if they stand still...the kind that are never nice....I know that sounds cruel, since I myself, am a fat guy, BUT, it's those kind of fat people just ruin it for the rest of us chubzors...

So what if a girl has some chub? I personally would prefer a woman with a mind, a point of view, and some meat on her bones. As opposed to these skinny model wannabes who might blow away in a small gust of wind, who has to wear toddler clothes because a size 0 is too big for her. The ones that are so fucking obsessed about their hip bones having to be perfectly symmetrical with one another sticking out at a 90 degree angle, hip bones that are so sharp, you could pick her up, and use her as an axe to chop down a tree if need be.

Maybe it's the fat talking, but give me a woman with a body bigger than a fucking match stick! WOMEN ARE MEANT TO HAVE CURVES DAMMIT! NOT JUTTING BONES! AND RAISENS FOR TITS!

Gah, close minded people, I hate them all!

Oh, and another thing, just because we're fat, doesn't mean that we're there for boredom! Plus, if you piss us off, we can sit on you and crush you like the little ant you are!
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