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Old 04-16-04   #1
New Blood
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Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: The Past
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three guys and a girl

me and a friend liked this girl, when we first saw her we both agreed that should one of us get her first, we won't let that ruin our friendship. Than I found out that the girl liked me, at first I was a little hesitant but someone made me tell this to the other friend. My friend appeared to like the girl a lot, and I too like this girl--But there were things that prevented me and the girl from settling down anything concrete, so we never really dated.

There was some other dude who liked this girl too, he tried to go after her, but she blew him off. All this time the guy has been trying his luck in the background. And this same guy messed things up for me last year, cause I liked someone and he liked that person too.

For the past weeks people have been asking me about how things are between the two of us. As the number of people who ask grew I started getting really uneasy about everything. It was as if they know something---it didn't take long before those questions mutated to something more like "whats is up between this girl and that guy, I see them together quite a lot".....I've tried to play kool with the situation but couldn't take it any longer as conversations between me and the girl started taking a meaningless turn. She's been acting strange towards me too, sometimes she would act all shy and uneasy--and later on when I ask her about it she would be all apologetic.

Anyways at the same time while all this was circling around, the friend with whom I've agreed not to let anything change our friendship has been slightly different. He is the same person, but something wasn't quite right. We both rap so he made a song about this girl I like, but for some strange reason I never really guessed it would be about her, till I carefuly read the lyrics. He asked me to take part and do a verse for this song--but I couldn't get myself after learning all this. I wasn't entirely bothered by all this, so I just played along---a few days ago this friend has changed even more, he has now moved towards changing his appearance.

Yesterday I found out that he is doing all this because of this girl I like, I was told that he liked this girl since the first day he saw her, but what puzzled me was why now--and a friend told me that cause the girl I like, now likes the other dude who has messed things up for me last year. I was really furious about this, but that feeling quickly died out. It was as though I don't really care. Later that night I couldn't go to sleep. I stayed up all night thinking about how this friend of mine who liked this girl must have felt when he found out that this girl likes me. Imagining just how much he must've felt hurt, bothered me a lot more than the fact that this girl likes someone else.

Before going to bed I had a little chat with the girl, I asked her two hard hitting questions, she couldn't answer them and kept quiet. I figured she probably knows that I now know everything

I felt soo guilty regardless of the fact that we both agreed to stay kool should either on of us get the girl. All I could think about is going up to this girl and telling her just how much this friend of mine really likes her...I wanted to tell her about the song he did, how he knows soo much about all the little details about her. But then there was my feelings for this girl too, but they didn't feel so strong. All attention towards my feelings for this girl just felt dead. That night I had a little talk with her which almost gave her the idea that I know she likes someone, she couldn't say anything she just kept quiet. All she said after an hour of silence is goodnight, see you tomorrow---bye and she left.

Unable to sleep all night all I could think about is telling the girl how much my friend likes her, and at the same time I wanted to fuck the life of this new guy she likes. I came up with the most horrible way to get this guy so badly, and was already to get all these thoughts into action today. Strangely though when I went to school and saw this girl, everything took a different turn. Mixed feelings for this girl exploded and splattered all over my inside. I didn't quite know if I wanted her or not, but I couldn't stop myself from looking at her.

The guy that she supposedly now likes tried to approach her, but she didn't seem to show even the slightest of interest in him---At first I thought she was only playing like that cause I kept looking at her, with my cap lowered down over my eyes. Even in class I kept my cap low over my eyes, and she looked towards me several times. During choir class she just ignored the guy I was told she now likes---when class was over the guy walked towards the door to wait for her. But as she came out she walked really fast, walked passed him, I was with a friend and as she walked pass us, she slowed her pace. I wanted to call out to her, but decided not to.

I still like her, but I feel lost at the moment---I can't feel anything, all my emotions are dead at the moment. I feel bad for my friend who likes her, and I feel soo against this new guy who is trying to get her. And with that said I still have my fluctuating feelings. So I ask for your advice, what should I do? I want to get everything out. I want to tell her everything about my friend, I want to screw the new guys day----I feel soo mixed up what is the right thing to do?????????????
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