Thread: Less Than Kain
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Old 07-14-03   #1
Kain424
Death to Hollywood
 
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Less Than Kain

Monday.

Today I have decided to start up y own little journal. This will be my sixth attempt to create a journal for myself. Two of my others were online journals, so I am no stranger to doing this.

I just checked out my horoscope today. I do this everyday, here is what it says:

"The need to feel secure will make you act irrationally today. Pay attention to what you do and say when you are nervous, especially around important people. Assuming that things will work out well is the only way to avoid tension today."

I hate that BS sometimes. Here are a few things about me that you might find interesting:

I can be insanely obsessive over things others would call trivial. (Like organization, health, even cleaning)
I don't masturbate.
I haven't gotten off in months...not once this year.
I lead more than one life.
I am not a fan of porn for sexual use. (Wonder what I mean, don't you?)

I kind of think that I'm crazy but I know I'm not. Just because I have the ability to rationalize about this very subject, leads me to believe I am still sane. I don't really think that I'm going crazy, either.

I complain an awful lot. I suppose it's because I don't really like people. Especially those who percieve themselves as authority figures. I was happy when I finally left high school because of the shit I had to digest there. I couldn't do it. Learning was easy, it was the social shit that bothered me. I had my friends, but most of them dropped out.

Friends. I suppose that's really why I'm on here. I have friends, but I need to know that there are more people who feel like me out there. I am especially interested to see if there are any females out there like me. All my life I have wondered why men and women are so different. But people hav always assured me that there is someone out there for everyone. A "soul mate." The very idea is quite enticing. But thusfar I have found it to be very unrealistic.

Girlfriends. I've had too many. I lost my virginity at a young age and now regret it. There have been a lot of poor chices made on my part, many of which still haunt me. I haven't had a girlfriend all this year so far. It's actually been quite refreshing! But there are those nights when I wish that I just had someone to hold onto. Another warm body next to mine, another soul to hold dear, another person to speak to, another one to love, another reason to live.

Well, that's enough soul-bearing for now. I'm out of here.
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