Why do they think you have to be the most drop dead girl to have. Have to skinny and all that. They might as well pick up necro while they are at it. I'm fucking sick and tired of being judged by outer beauty rather than something else. and I found the answer why the population of lesbians go up each year.

Sounds to me like you've met all the wrong kind of guys. Don't waste your time with people like that, it'll just drag you down and make you bitter.

You think women don't judge other women by outer beauty too? Get a clue, friend. You're sick of the human tendency to care too much about appearance.

I like men. Not all of them are assholes, plenty are decent blokes, appearance isn't everything etc etc.
If you were comfortable with your own appearance you would just get rid of the bloke who didn't like the way you looked.

And admit it, you judge people by appearance, we all do. Just people disagree over what makes a person attractive, taste varies. For every man you find who like's em skinny you'll find one who doesn't. Same with blondes and brunettes, short people, tall people, the list goes on.
If you like who you are and the way you look it doesn't matter, however there are a lot of people with image insecurities, you just have to either accept the way you look or change it.

so become a lesbian if you hate it so much, but I don't think it will help much, as girls don't generally like ugly people either.

Amen.

He repeats exactly what I said, and HE gets an "amen"? Ingrates.

Amen. HALLEJULA!!!!
*speaks in tounges*

...there, happy?

be like me, happily hate everyone.

You know, I often look at other women and wish I looked better... Yeah I am pretty but there is room for improvement.

Holy shit! I mean, it's fine and dandy a man who dates some nasty fat chick with a great personality but come on! I mean, I think people should judge by looks AND personality. It is granted that you could date a drop-dead gorgeous chick and she could be the biggest bitch in history. BUT I think it works both ways. A guy could date some really fugly chick and she could have the best personality in the world... The least the chick could do is make a fucking effort to improve her esthetics so she is pleasing to the eye.

All this crap about looks not being important is just guys/girls pawning off their insecurities because they can't date pretty guys/girls or because they have esthetic issues of their own....

People should suck it up and make the effort to find some middle ground to look more pleasing to the eye... Yeah they may not be perfect but pissing and moaning about how ugly or fat etc they are is going to make them look pathetic... People should stop bitching and do something about their insecurities....

A sexy guy (much like yourself antihero *wink*) dating a fat ugly chick.... Never gonna happen. BUT if you like the fat ugly chick and she likes you... SHe should make a fucking effort to improve her looks, lose some weight and stop pissing and moaning about it. I think that is fair price to pay to date some hawt guy...

I don't agree with that.
From my own experience losing weight is not easy, despite having the motivation of a gorgeous attractive man. It's an awful experience for most people and feeling you have to improve yourself for someone is an incredible pressure, and rarely if a person thinks that way will they ever feel deserving of said attractive partner, no matter how much they change themselves physically.

A good friend once said to me something along the lines of 'this is the way I see it: the exterior is gonna change, but what's inside stays the same.'
He's right.

There's a guy I know, and y'no I wouldn't care if it turned out he was a midget, or very overweight, or physically disfigured in any way, I'd still think he was hot and extremely shaggable, because the exterior is just that- an exterior.
Looks do count, but only in being physically and carnally attracted to someone. People's tastes are different. Like I'd swear my bum was too big, but blokes have adored it, despite my insistence on them getting their eyes tested.

Women are often more sensitive about their appearance than men. You want big boobs, but the price to pay for naturally big boobs is a belly or large thighs. You have a flat stomach, but you're bony and uncomfortable.

I think a final thing is when you truly care about and love someone you see them completely differently to how a stranger sees them. Things like a bit of cellulite on the thighs or a squidgy tummy or an excessively large forehead or a hairy back don't matter so much unless you're looking for a trophy boyfriend/girlfriend.

I think you're (deliberately?) missing Neena's point, Sybs. Answer this question: would you prefer to look like you look now, or some "typical fat chick" ?...now we all know the answer to that. We all know aesthetics is important to us. It's vanity to various degrees. No one wants to have sex with someone that they have to always be looking deep within to that person to convince themselves that this is the right person for them.

Everyone knows personality is a trillion times more important. If you don't, then you'll end up in shallow relationships for the rest of your life. And you won't get any pity from me if you're that kind of person....

The one thing I agree with you (Sybs) is that no one should ever change for someone, but self-improvement that leads to growth in confidance is something entirely different. And however odd it might seem, there are enough couples out there that I see (my 65 yr old male dentist I saw at the bar was one of them!!) that can attract "hot" women and such. Granted, it's probably due to money, but whatever.

Take Celine Dion and her 60 year old husband. I'm sure we all have this collective opinion that it's a shallow perverted relationship, but we really don't know that as a fact, do we? For my arguements sake, lets consider it as a sound relationship since they have been together for "forever" after all....

Another thing. It's not personality that is attractive and neither is it looks as much as confidance. Confidance is so.. I dunno.. it's AMAZING. I know a lot of people that get a partner that is "so out of their league" and it's all due to their confidance. There is no "league"...that's all in your mind. It's an illusion. People are sluts for attention and love for the most part. Doesn't matter how hot or ugly you are. I've come to conclusions (at times) that the prettier a girl is, the easier she is to hop in bed with you...mainly cause this world is so overrun by lust and hormones and when a girl thinks that all she has going for her is her looks...that's all she is capable of selling......it's sad. But we all love pr0n, right? So, that's not gonna end any time soon...

My "final" opinion is loosely this: I'm claiming that as long as you're not carrying around excessive amounts of unattractive physical traits (as long as you're not truly ugly) and as long as you're an overall nice person and yadda yadda...couple that with confidance...you can get pretty much any person you want that isn't caught up in racial barriers, social class barriers, and all other stupid mental blocks that shallow people restrict themselves with. But that's just it...we're all caught up in being self-absorbed (vanity, self-pity, narcissism, etc...take your pick) that we let all sorts of great people pass us by.

Kudos to all the strong relationships out there.

Yeah, well, generally people don't go out with people they find physically unnattractive, often because genetically their chances of reproducing aren't so good.
So I find it doubtful that while fucking your partner you're thinking 'oh man, her arse is revoltingly huge, but she has such a beautiful heart!'.

Exactly. Like I said, looks are important to us, whether we want to admit it or not. And by the way, I'm not trying to debate with you or anything. I was just trying to clear up and build on what Neena said...I'm not saying everything I said was foolproof either. But it keeps my options a lot more open than a lot of other people I know, that's all I know. How's it lookin' over on your end?

What, in terms of finding anyone to bone me? I'm single.

But hey, I'm not looking really, because that never works, and the unexpected is much more interesting

Heh, i should just hop a plane and show up on your stoop.

Men don't like fat girls either you get your ass on a bike or become a lesbian,but then again i doubt girls want to stick their head between two giant walls of fat and meat.

Oh well there's always the vibrator and dr. phil.

Dr. Phil is a conservative Texan fuck-face.