darling.
i hate what i've
become.

i'd give every ounce
of blood in me,
just to give you some.

these tears erase my smile,
& make my face a
hollow gray.
while the rain seems
to be pouring,
i dig my shallow grave.

the dirt and blood
caked under my nails,
accents the saddness on my face.
i never thought,
in my wildest dreams,
you'd find me
in this place.

baby, i disappear
when your hand
leaves my side.

i feel my weak knees
shaking.
I've already lost
my pride.

I never though you'd
find me.
I'm ashamed to show my face.

I'll lay my body
in this grave.
I'm such a damn
disgrace.

nice.

with all that hurt and self-hatred, if you had shaped it a little more that would have been amazing. nice work, keep it up.

I can't breathe
When i see your face.
I feel my chest
tighten.
my throat close.
my hands begin
to shake.
& my thoughts explode
in different
directions.

i feel the tears again.
oh god, not the tears.
They cloud my eyes
as i stumble to the door.
hiding the fact that
the blood
is flooding my cheeks.

just look at me....
but no.
dont.
keep walking.
let me continue to be
nothing
to you.
I wouldnt know how to react
if you pretended to care.
if you walked up to me
to take my bleeding heart.
again.
I'd still feel like
nothing.
breathe & act
like nothing.

baby, because of you
i AM nothing.