Why not Register and remove some of the ads from The Dark Forums  | | | Stranded Soldier
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 | Mindless Illusion of Thought -
08-03-05
Revelation
Walking through the darkness past
Fingertips stride across cold pale walls
Transforming memories through frosted windows
Watching time burn and freeze to sudden motion
Blowing the dust from many books of tears
Following footsteps through the pains of life
A flame adjusts to every movement in the air
A mouth once sewn shut takes its first gasp of life
Wandering pages upon pages with open eyes
Facing the reflection of a child against an image of a woman
Blood that once ran thick with hatred and selfishness
Reside beneath the scars of age and forgiveness
One by one the stories become lessons for life
A story written through the eyes of the beholder
A heart once broken now mended with wisdom
The river of tears has long been dried up
Desperation is but a figment of imagination
Overcoming the past is the worst nightmare
Strife and redemption is your only revelation
Mindless Illusion of Thought © Dalynda R. Baker
拥抱崇拜吸毒者
There's no need to cover an internal problem with an external fix. | |
|  | | 21st Century Digital Boy
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08-07-05
how did i miss this last time i was here? bah!
wheeeew... i gotta say, you come back strong. this is one of the best i've ever seen you write.
take you a while to feel strongly about something again?
this is different from your previous things. it's full of redemption, healing. it's a wonderful new look, and i have to say it lifts the soul to read it. well, that's how it seemed to me, anyway...
a part of me was dissapointed, waiting for that tactile memory you could always bring about... but, this is different. this is better? ::shrug:: i don't know... but i like this.
if I can make just nine people a day stare at me in abject horror and confusion... i think i've done my job.
there are only 10 kinds of people in the world: those that can read binary, and those that can't.
you know what? i still want a girl with a short skirt and a long jacket. (%) | |
| | | Voodoo Klown
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08-30-05
Strong imagery, but the rhythm was akward. Hard to determine if you are trying to be profound, uplifting, or both. Strong Christain overtone shows a commitment to faith.
Hooah!!
"To be politically correct, I am not a klown. I am a grease-painted flesh eating demon who just so happens to be the next step on the evolutionary ladder." To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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| | | Registered User
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09-03-05
This is very good! your words have touched my dark soul.
"I'm a dark soul, lost in this cold and loveless world" | |
| | | Stranded Soldier
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09-04-05
Quote: |
Originally Posted by Doktor Demo Strong imagery, but the rhythm was akward. Hard to determine if you are trying to be profound, uplifting, or both. Strong Christain overtone shows a commitment to faith.
Hooah!! |
Funny thing is, I'm in no way religious.
*scratches head*
拥抱崇拜吸毒者
There's no need to cover an internal problem with an external fix. | |
| | | satanic teddybear Forum Guide
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09-04-05
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Originally Posted by Dark~Mage This is very good! your words have touched my dark soul. | hahahahahaha
anywho, has for the poem itself.....purdy good....strong imagery, some nice lines.....some areas seemed a little force.....my only suggestion is that i'd like to see some more poetic devices bein' used....some internal rhymes, off rhymes, alliteration, etc......but overall, purdy good
I was masturbating
just contemplating
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| | | Voodoo Klown
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09-12-05
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Originally Posted by Demon's Eclipse Funny thing is, I'm in no way religious.
*scratches head* | If not I apologize, but that is the impression I was give when I read this poem.
Hooah!!
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09-13-05
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Originally Posted by Doktor Demo If not I apologize, but that is the impression I was give when I read this poem.
Hooah!! |
Okay...
Just out of curiousity? What's up with the Hooah thing? You've said that twice.
拥抱崇拜吸毒者
There's no need to cover an internal problem with an external fix. | |
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09-13-05
Revelation
Walking through the darkness past
Fingertips stride across cold pale walls
Transforming memories through frosted windows
Watching time burn and freeze to sudden motion
Blowing the dust from many books of tears
Following footsteps through the pains of life
A flame adjusts to every movement in the air
A mouth once sewn shut takes its first gasp of life
Wandering pages upon pages with open eyes
Facing the reflection of a child against an image of a woman
Blood that once ran thick with hatred and selfishness
Reside beneath the scars of age and forgiveness
One by one the stories become lessons for life
A story written through the eyes of the beholder
A heart once broken now mended with wisdom
The river of tears has long been dried up
Desperation is but a figment of imagination
Overcoming the past is the worst nightmare
Strife and redemption is your only revelation
Mindless Illusion of Thought © MindWarped
I stole your shit | |
| | | 21st Century Digital Boy
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09-13-05
Quote: |
Originally Posted by Demon's Eclipse Okay...
Just out of curiousity? What's up with the Hooah thing? You've said that twice. | unless i'm wrong, it's an army thing. my buddy Chrapla says it all the time--or, did when he was in the service.
if I can make just nine people a day stare at me in abject horror and confusion... i think i've done my job.
there are only 10 kinds of people in the world: those that can read binary, and those that can't.
you know what? i still want a girl with a short skirt and a long jacket. (%) | |
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09-14-05
Quote: |
Originally Posted by mindwarped Revelation
Walking through the darkness past
Fingertips stride across cold pale walls
Transforming memories through frosted windows
Watching time burn and freeze to sudden motion
Blowing the dust from many books of tears
Following footsteps through the pains of life
A flame adjusts to every movement in the air
A mouth once sewn shut takes its first gasp of life
Wandering pages upon pages with open eyes
Facing the reflection of a child against an image of a woman
Blood that once ran thick with hatred and selfishness
Reside beneath the scars of age and forgiveness
One by one the stories become lessons for life
A story written through the eyes of the beholder
A heart once broken now mended with wisdom
The river of tears has long been dried up
Desperation is but a figment of imagination
Overcoming the past is the worst nightmare
Strife and redemption is your only revelation
Mindless Illusion of Thought © MindWarped
I stole your shit |
Great.... thanks. 
拥抱崇拜吸毒者
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| | | Voodoo Klown
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09-14-05
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Originally Posted by Demon's Eclipse Okay...
Just out of curiousity? What's up with the Hooah thing? You've said that twice. | It's an Army thing. Hooah!!
"To be politically correct, I am not a klown. I am a grease-painted flesh eating demon who just so happens to be the next step on the evolutionary ladder." To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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| | | Stranded Soldier
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09-15-05
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Originally Posted by Doktor Demo It's an Army thing. Hooah!! |
I know it's an army thing... I just don't get why you'd respond that way in a poetry thread....
nevermind.
拥抱崇拜吸毒者
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| | | Voodoo Klown
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09-15-05
*pats head* Good girl.
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| | | 21st Century Digital Boy
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09-15-05
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Originally Posted by Doktor Demo *pats head* Good girl. | good girl? you must not know her well. 
if I can make just nine people a day stare at me in abject horror and confusion... i think i've done my job.
there are only 10 kinds of people in the world: those that can read binary, and those that can't.
you know what? i still want a girl with a short skirt and a long jacket. (%) | |
| | | Stranded Soldier
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09-19-05
Hey! Just cause I'm not good... shouldn't mislead you that I'm not a girl!
And I'd appreciate it if you didn't *pat* me Doktor. That makes me angry.
拥抱崇拜吸毒者
There's no need to cover an internal problem with an external fix. | |
| | | Almighty... what was it?
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09-19-05
Bad girls can be good you know. *pats doktor*
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09-19-05
oh, enough with the flirting... MORE POETRY!! 8P
___Nick_the_Rogue___
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| | | Voodoo Klown
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09-19-05
lol!!
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09-22-05
Hmmm I need inspiration...
拥抱崇拜吸毒者
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