Finding air, light and life within yourself is the hardest thing to do for people like me.
Happiness can never come without pain.
Never feeling the air without suffocating
Never finding light without being in the dark
Never finding life without experiencing the thoughts of death.
There is always a yesterday and never a tomorrow.
Life is what it is and you must give and take to make a circle. Until then, you will not find happiness.
Find happiness and forgiveness within yourself, give back what is given and you will find peace.
Except life and you will exist in a life that is yours to love and live!

I made love to you once again.
You made me face you and feel you within.
I felt you lips upon by breast, you hands on my skin.
I felt a beauty that you and I hold together within.
For a moment the hurt and pain was gone.
For that moment I was so strong.
Holding you close and pulling you in.
The world seemed to hold it's spin.
You rubbed you face on my cheek.
It was so gentle and but was not meek.
Our love will always be there, no matter what is to come.
And you and I know our love will be there no matter how far we run.
I know I have hurt you deep that's true.
But never once did I stop loving you.
I want a chance, even as friends, to mend you heart and the trust I betrayed.
I was hurt to but I know the truth came to your dismay.
Words could never tell you how sorry I am.
I should have never hurt a wonderful man.
So kind and gentle with thoughts of love.
Your heart is kinds but not as pure as a dove.
At the end of all this I may be left behind.
And once again loose the man that was mine.
That is a chance I am willing to take.
Taking that chance knowing once again my heart may brake.

My hands are cold and my knees are weak.
I feel your hands slap my cheeks.
I tell you to stop and you listen not.
Pushing and pulling, I can't get you away.
Will this be my last day?
I learned from you how cold you can be.
You won't even face me.
I have been used, and that's why I feel nothing for you!

those last two seem odd paired up as they are...

are they... related?


the first one was geed, except "i seen my shadow" bugs me. did you mean "I see" or "I have seen?"

anyway, not bad. there's a lot behind and within your work, just work on the shape.

that's the part i find hardest, myself. (%)

HA! I missed that. It's fixed now. I don't always reread what I write. I just get it down. Thank you for the advice.

No the last two are not related. Just there. Most likely what I write has nothing to do with the one before or after. Should it? I just like to write what comes to mind, or what I have been through...nothing more nothing less.

I stand in the cold silent winter.
Not be heard or seen.
I feel the brisk air upon my breast.
And the fog creeping upon my skin.
Blood freezing as it pumps from my heart.
How do I face this feeling that has torn me apart?
A child once within my flesh, torn from my body.
Not a part of you, but a part of me.
Feeling of shame and guilt within.
The hurt is still here, not only for you but for me.
Killing the flesh that was mine,
I will never be forgiven, not in this lifetime.
I will never forgive myself for what I have done.
This feeling aches in my chest and in my flesh.
How will I face myself when I am gone?
How do I learn to be strong and forgive what I have done wrong?

I see your eyes and the rage within
You come close to me and my tingling skin
You pull my hair and bite my breast
I scream out load, however not in pain.
You turn me around and throw me down.
I feel your blade down my back
my blood flows to the floor as you kiss my neck
picking me up to see my face
I have a smile as I lick my blood off your lips
You plunge yourself inside me with great force
My screams are pleasure to your ears
I love the look on your face when you see my tears
hands around my neck I can scream no more
You fill me with your pleasure and I can see no more.

i just wondered if they were about the same person or not. to se them together like that... it's a hell of a switch.

and, i like the first one of these last two. nice imagery, tactile imagery--er, you know what i mean, right?

Those two are not about the same person. Sometimes I write from what I know and have touched, and sometimes it just thoughts that come to mind.
And yes, I do know what you mean.
Thank you again I like hearing what you have to say about what I write.

I found a way out of my skin.
I cut and tare it from every limb.
The pain is greatly intense, and somehow numb
I feel free from the beauty I hate
No more stares of lust, only stares of disgust.
Laugh at me if you will,
It’s only the outer beauty that I have killed.

To you my love (Zuki)

Thoughts of you, love and laughter.
Forever more, here and after.
Living our life together, me and you.
Finding a wonderful light shining though.
Seeing your smile everyday.
And feeling your touch takes my breath away.

We have a love that is pure and true.
I found a light inside of you.
Through thick and thin, here we are.
I can’t believe we made it this far.
Yes we took a 7 week brake,
You found someone else you thought would ease the ache
Finding she was nothing to compare,
to the love we have and will always share.
You opened me up and I feel so new.
I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.

i loved the opening of this one, i think it starts the strongest of any poem yet--

but that may just be because i'm fond of the idea of skin-removal imagery. i know, it's weird.

anyway, i think you lose it in the last three lines. it's like you had an idea, but didn't know how to finish it. again, maybe that's my perceptions, i have that problem alot.

anyway, i liked that one.

Hmmm, After reading it again, I know what you are saying....however I wrote that yesterday at work and that's just how I felt at the moment.....it was the reason why I wanted to remove my skin. Maybe if I feel in a skin removal mode again, I will have something better, maybe putting a little thought into something and not just throwing it out there....thank you again.

I have a hard time just sitting down and trying to write....It just randomly comes to me and then I write it down. If I try to think of something to write, well it comes out worse then this. HA didn't think that could happen.

I have hurt and betrayed your heart and sole.
The hurt you feel, I may never know.
I pray everyday that I can take the pain away.
I want you to be enjoy life in every way.
I miss your laughter and your smile.
I know to see that again may take awhile.
I can’t express in words or in thoughts how sorry I am.
I can only hope you realize the regrets that are within.
My love is true and I will always be here for you.
As a lover or a friend, I never want to hurt you again.
We both have faults and a kindness within.
I am still working on finding mine again.
So much to say and so many feelings.
I want us to start with a new beginning.
The past will always be there.
That I am truly aware.
I cannot change what has been done.
I can only hope for forgiveness for what I did wrong.
If you can’t I do understand.
You are still a kind hearted man.
My love will be for ever and true.
Nothing will ever make me stop loving you.

I feel I should crawl back into my space,
where no one can touch me or slap the past in my face.
Desolate in this life that I call hell
I open my love to be freed from that sell.
You called me when I was trying to let you go.
I let you back into my heart an my soul.
Who I was then and how I am now.
I am is still the same person, but different somehow.
Did you come back to teach me a lesson in life,
Or did you come back to see if you could make me your wife.
These are questions I ask myself,
But does it really matter when I am put on that shelf.
Wait for an answer to so many things,
No really wanting the answer because of the sting.
Some how I will get though all this.
With or without you, hit or miss.
I am stronger then I ever have been before,
I took the weakness out of me and shut it behind a door.
I will look with only love and understanding.
However, will not bow down for anyones demanding.
You may love me, but still push me away.
Maybe you will open your eyes to me soon one day.
I will never look at you with doleful eyes.
For my love for you I can never again disguise.
You can love me or not, that’s up to you,
I will never ask you to choose.

I stand in the winters cold
Breeze bites my checks
I breath the air into my lungs
The sting of it, so sweet.
Skyclad, here I stand.
Close my eyes and listen to nature
Sounds of beauty and life all around
Hands in the air as I spin
I look to the sky and give thanks for all I see
My children and man thinking I'm insane
Letting the pain of frost sink into my skin.
Insane I maybe and all may see
However, this is the life that is inside of me.

not bad. not bad at all.

simple, and personal.

i like it.

Thank you