Just popping in to say hi. Hope everyone is doing okay.

Hey bitch!

Man, that sounds worse than I thought it would. I always wanted a justified reason to say that..

Actually, I woke up in an unusually good mood today, most likely partially due to the fact that my parents will be out for the greater part of the day.. so yes, all's well today, so far. Thanks for asking

i wish my dad would leave.. he's sitting here breathing down my neck..

Your dad's breathing down your neck and you go and post on a self injury thread? Wow, you have more confidence in your parents' ignorance than I do..

That is unnerving, though.

my mother is stupid like that too. when i had a cut across my wrist a few weeks ago ,i wanted to see if she would even notice so i wrapped gauze all around my wrist and put bandaids across the gauze ,she never even looked twice.

My mother went through stages of caring and not caring. In the beginning she felt that I did it just to piss her off and blame her for ruining my life. Then she turned into Uber Bitch Mom and took anything and everything she thought I would use to cut myself. And dragged me to the ER room and Baker Acted my ass everytime she felt like it. To make up for the facts behind why I was cutting etc. Finally the last 4 years(or their about)she just didn't give a rats ass anymore. She honestly and truthfully gave up on me. Which hurt like few other things have in my life. She wasn't worried when I literally could move my arm cause I cut over a major vein. She just got this far away look in her eyes and walked out of my room. She told me once that she was just disgusted and fed up with my addcition. And my Grandparent's were worse in some ways. My mother would tell my Grandmother or she would see the bandages, and she would say"How could you be so STUPID! This isn't a game you're playing,; you're ruining our lives. What do you want people to think of us??!!" Never once did my Grandmother EVER ask me how I felt, or if I was ok, or why I cut etc myself. To them it was all about how I was ruining their lives and dreams. To hell with what was really going on inside my head. I had to make their live and dreams and hopes live up to the worlds view.
That's when I entered what I referr to my Black and Red period. I gave up on myself (or so I had thought)and cut as many as 5 times a day, everyday. It got to the point where I broke into a area of SI and SM that most don't reach. I cut on very visiable areas of my body. I didn't do it for attention I did it as a warning to the world so no one would even talk to me. I wanted my body to look as bad as my soul felt. I wanted a brand that the minuet someone saw they knew I was a monster and then would leave me alone. I wanted to just given in and believe what people said about me.
But by some miracle (whether or not you believe in God doesn't matter)I found a Doctor that wouldn't give up on me like so many others. Even though I pushed hard enough to make him hate me.
My point is that some people(parents included)can't see anything except what they want to see. Or what they can't wrap their little minds around and rationalize in some twisted way. It's like playing a electric guitar outside someone window and having them sleep through it. Some people(parents)will never wake up to the pain of the truth. But someone out there will and won't leave you walking around with guaze on your wrist without asking why.(and really meaning it).

I`d like Hexen to post here if she can. Not something that can be done now though.

hey everyone (oooh my first post)....where i live i've only ever met a few people who injure themselves (other than me) so i had to read this...seems im the odd one out though, sorry if anyone finds this offensive but: when i started cutting myself it was because i hated myself, my life and who i was. but i started liking it and and just do it for fun now (you'd be amazed how many girls just run when you ask them to cut you because you like it :p) i love the sight of blood aswell (and the taste...but im not a vampire..it just tastes nice) Anyway what i was saying was that even when i was happy i couldnt stop...the reasons for it just changed. i know this isnt what you wanted and im sorry but your thread has reminded me of how i used to cope and im going to have to go back to it cus some bad stuff has happened.. dont think its your fault because its not, would have happened anyway


god-damn it felt so good to say that...never told anyone before, thank you

The kind of self injury I use is carving. I haven't done it for a few months. But what I would do is, I would take a saftey pin or small knife, basically anything that would scracth my skin enough to make it scab. Then I would tear the scab out over and over until I would know it would scar. I would do weird designs or letters. I don't know why I did it, most likely because I had no reason not to.

thats real good bambam...im sure youll do well with school

i do that to...pick off scabs and now i have lots of scars all over,as 4 the whole hating yourself thing...well i hate myself, i have 4 along time...but i still cut myself aswell.

ok im going now
bye bye bambam

powder

ill be ok bambam