ok my little tempure has started last night... i don't know what the fuck is going on with me... but i could care less about my fucking additude right know... i know that this does not sound like shy girl... but i have been moody... you know how when people get to you... you had it up to here... well that is how i am... i don't mind about the way i feel... becuase i think that it is good that i'm feeling this way...

instead of fucking being nice and sweet all the time... then getting smashed in the head...

so do you all feel like that... to where you say fuck it... i don't care how i feel anymore...

i couldn't say that i don't care how i feel anymore... it's not that i am always nice and sweet though, it really depends on people that i have to deal with. i may be angry quite often, but can't say i feel myself any better at those times...

mmmm...mentration is sooooooo dreamy for cynics...

you know i'm still feeling this way today... you are right... it does depend on the people you have to deal with... heh i can't make self my better right know... but i don't know... i feel that it is good... that i am this way... i can't really describe... what the fuck i'm feeling... but i will say that i just have a lot of anger in me... i feel strong minded then what i did before... if that had made any sence...

I cant relate i mean well i guess i can, because people have just got used to me, i mean i live too lives, the giddy little school gurl nice and easy going, then theres this depressed goth, and then theres the bitch that you dont dare cross paths with. I mean i hate not knowing witch one i am or who i am, or at least what the hell i am, but according to people i do that just so i have a reason to hate the world. i dont always hate the world, i mean i care alot, probably too much about people, well the ones that accept me. Im out to change the world, and yet at the same time distroy it *sigh* i know i aint making ne sense, sorry, but yeah, people cant always expect you to be walked over all the time hun

hmm, i can assume that your name change is connected with the change in your feelings then? that's all a bit strange. people are not undergoing drastic changes in personality too often... i think something like that happened to me before too, not too sure how to describe it...

anyway, since i just finished watching Serial Experiments Lain, my mind is in complete mess... i think i won't be able to give any more comprehendable thoughts for at least a week after that...

I am almost always in a bad mood, I just have different levels. Usually they aren't that bad. Sometimes I'm not in a bad mood at all. But I won't ever take it out on my friends. No matter how mad I am my friends are my life and I will never disrespect them unless they disrespect me. Usually when I'm in a bad mood I keep to myself and stuff....Hmmm...I just realized I went off topic. Okay, I'm going to go sit over here now. Hehe...uhh...yes.

yep i feel you there...

well you are right on the track with the name change... you know with this nick Dark_Rain... i feel more confident... then what i did before with the name shy girl... Dark_Rain kind of gives me a chance to start over... i feel more like i could say what ever the fuck i want to say... i feel more stronger with my additue about things... then what i ever did... i'm glad that i have changed the nick though... i see the name shy girl... as someone who is weak... and can't really fight back... i know all this sounds a little funny though... but i'm still the same person...

hope everything will work out well with your mind....

no no that is ok... you know i was worried about my additude last night... you know since i have been changing latley... i hope that i don't take it out on my friends... or even the people that i know in person... i keep everything really to my self...

if the nick change gave you more confidence then it was certainly worth it.

i think i had similar experiences with personality change myself before and actually i am experiencing something like that now too. i don't think the changes are that big though. it's not like you become a totally different person. it is like you just learned more about yourself, unlocked some hidden part of yourself and it's just been added to you. maybe it's connected with slight changes of how you perceive the world around you, maybe with something else. anyway, i'm sure that everything will work out fine for both of us. it did for me before at least

that is how i feel about my nick... i am glad that i have changed it... its funny how your feeling could change... when you do something new... wow we both feel the same about this personlality change...



it is like you just learned more about yourself, unlocked some hidden part of yourself and it's just been added to you. maybe it's connected with slight changes of how you perceive the world around you, maybe with something else. anyway, i'm sure that everything will work out fine for both of us. it did for me before at least [/b][/quote]

right know i'm starting to get a new different part of my self... that i have never really felt before... even with my additude changing into anger like this... like i don't know its hard to explain... i'm not all of a sudden afraid.... to speak my mind... i'm not afraid to tell people what i really think...

but yeah we both... you and i will be fine...

sounds to me like it's not anger you found. maybe it's the shyness you lose?

yeah that could be it...

I'd agree that it sounds a bit more confident, all right...

But no matter what, you know you'll always be my favorite drinking partner...

you know when ever you need someone to drink with... i'm always there man!!

I think any change is good as long as you are happy with it Shy. I'm glad you are no longer keeping things in and are finally sharing your opinion no matter what anyone thinks. I give you two thumbs up and hope you are happier now...