OK. the whole thing started when i started to date this kid ryan. we broke up and went out a couple of times,6. i know thats alot and all my friends tell me not to date him even though i have strong feelings for him. Then one day i was with my best friend,Tonya, and i met her cousin Ricky andi like him a lot and when i say i want to date him people tell me hes not good for me cuz hes a redneck and then when i say i want to date ryan they also say hes not good for me cuz hes a "freak". And then some people tell em to date both ofthem....i dont knwo what to do HELP!ARE THEY controling my life so its better for them? what do i do?

*hugglez* thats horrible, I can see why your so angery with her. She was your friend and she should have been able to see why you did what you did. God people infuriate me...

I can see what you were saying to me though, and I know I need to pull myself together, because even my mom, whos really close to me, told me I needed to get some friend...lol my respone was exactly...jee thanks mom... but shes right.
I dont want to go back to my old ones, theres just too much pain and everything there, but I know If I go to anywhere else, Im labled as running away and abandoning the people that I was supposed to care about...Im not trying to forget bethy, I just...I dont know what im doing...

and even if u would try to forget about her, u'll never be able to do so..u loved her once (as a friend or more) and u'll always love her..
it doesn't look like your friends are very understanding, they put all weight on your shoulders, telling u to get a grip at your life, when it's really hard to do by yourself..they shoudl be the ones supporting u and helping you to get yourself together..
before leaving them behind and looking at them as your past i'd have a talk to them...with everyone individual, cuz' in group people are less honest and react different than when you're alone with them..
you should now it's not bad to feel lost, or not weak to lose grip; it's completely normal and eventually u'll get stronger, step by step..ofcourse it would be easier waking up finding everything to be like before, but we all know that's impossible..u'll have to do it one day at a time..find people to talk to, and ways to express yourself..
i must go now, but u can pm me anytime you want to..

I guess I do need to talk to them, even if I just leave them a little note or something, but its hard, I have so much with them, and Im not the one thats prone to litterally run from them, Im the one that they always know will be there, and I feel like If I leave, then that makes me a bad person... I dunno to say the situation is confussing is an understatement. I think I just have to pick a path and take it...no matter how hard it is, I just have to decide what path.

don't rush it, cuz it's something you really need to think about, consider both paths..and if they're real friends u should be able to be honest and tell them how they make u feel..really, u can't make a decision without talking with them, and notes aren't very personal, just a talk in real life..calme and well-thought-of..
and if you leave them behind it's not a sign of weakness, the courage to take the step shows how strong u are

hehe yeah that seems simple...if only you knew my friends...

Take em Down!



If they really are big pricks they know it. They probably expect you to retaliate. Guess, you could just leave them hanging and let them beat themselves over it for you. Whatever.

Have you ever thought about seeking the counsel of a phycologist? I know it sounds harsh and weird but talking it over with someone who is... distant, from the problem can help.

Well if you let yourself get walked on all the time then you will get walked on all the time.

Raging needs to start getting back into the action and start thinking about himself. Same for pinkhippos. You don't ever earn respect that way. In fact, it sounds like they are in a situation where they lost part of their team, so now they are going it along. The further you let it go the more damage will be done. You better stand you for yourself now, because it's hard as hell to pick up from rock bottom.

By-the-way, I will not be logging in anymore. It's kind-of ironic talking about loss and then leaving, but this forum is too hostile. I tried making ammends with the guy who insulted me before I even started talking to anyone, but he is a prick. I didn't really expect anything else.

Bye

aww abigal I hope eventually you can vhange your mine, I know sometimes you do need a break from this place, I take some frequently. But if you dont thanks for everything.

I know that Im the only one with control on my life and eveyrthing that I do, but its hard to know where I want to go. I have a completely split personality, Im a very angry person and Im a little more than defiant and hostile myself, but Im also the happy little optimistic school girl. I honestly dont know who I want to be. Its confussiing and hard. I have thought about recieving perfessional help, but I dont want to becase the dark side of me doesnt want anything changed. not to mention that I dont want someone whos getting paid to pretend to care try to analyze me. I dont know...I just want out....