I dont know what it is... but seriously, I have issues trusting humans... and I have troubles getting to like them... I wish I knew why I dislike them so...

People in my school hate me or fear me because I, well am different... then I go to school, and my teacher belittles me because I was a couple minutes late because of the hospital group testing... people there make me feel like a pariah, like I will never truly fit in or at all.

then there is my family, I find it kind of odd, that I can hate those that so close with such passion... I mean seriously, what kind of mum tells her child that he was the result of margaritas?

Should I just stop caring? Should I just look out for me? or should I look out for someone else?

Everyday, I wonder what people tell me, would the world be better off without me? I still wonder, maybe their right...

Someone, please, help me out here...

don't believe what people tell you. i also have a trusting issue with people as well. you shouldn't take care of anyone but yourself. that would just cause you more hurt. but hey this kind of crap gets said all the time "people are here for a reason" even if they don't fit in. still they are apart of something in this life.i filled in the rest myself actually. people just give other shit. for all different types of reasons. why? we would never know untill we go up and ask them. people do things to other people out there own insecurities.hell i don't know if this has helped you out any. i've learned that people are only people.

hell i've been repeatedly hurt by people alot. still do get hurt by them till this very day. but not as much now i don't think. because i've been getting rid of people who make me feel bad and treat me like shit.

do what makes you happy.

my mom informed me that both my brother and i were conceived while she was on the pill. the doc lowered her doasage and BAM! here i am! however she does tell me that she wouldnt change a thing.

My mom told me straight out that i was an accident..

I don't hold it against her. No reason that i can think of to do that..

trouble trusting humans? do you trust sharks instead?
j/k once we get burned or backstabbed, we all end up with trust issues. itll pass. you dont believe me now but its true.

youre different? how are you different from any other insecure teenager in school? we would all like to think we are different but thats just not true.

most teachers will start shit with ANY student who is late. the teacher isnt picking on you, sugarplum.

and WHY oh WHY does everyone wanna 'fit in'? hell, i say STAND OUT! do your own thing! wy the hell should you care what they think?

i already covered this one.

ok is that like a suicide thing? cos thats so cliche. just look out for you. dont give a fuck what other people say.
learn to develop a tougher skin.

ok is that like a suicide thing? cos thats so cliche. just look out for you. dont give a fuck what other people say.
learn to develop a tougher skin.[/quote]

eh, its not a suicide thing... I am just truly curious, as to wether I really should care about being backstabbed or burned... it just feels pointless to recover when pain is just around the corner... but then again, if I did not get back up, the world wins... decisions...

I think you need to stop feeling so sorry for yourself. Your problems are trivial.

Maybe you are draconic- Oh my god, it's a dragon.

Seriously man, you need to grow up. Maybe take some medication for anxiety and paranoia.

I am working on getting meds... oh and billy, everyones problems are always trivial, except to themselves....

One other thing, I grew up way to fast for my own good... thats what happens when you get stabbed by someone you consider to be " that one". eh nothing huge, trivial yes because it happens so often, but its still large for me because, its my life.

No, some problems are truly trivial. If you lived in a miserable crack den and your pops was gone and your mother was sending you to pick up her drugs while you were starving because noone gae a shit if you ate. Your problems are not trivial. If your girlfriend shits on you and you family consideres you wiuerd because you act like a gothic douche, then your problems are trivial.

fair enough.

or you could keep your problems to yourself and not hear from every douche on the site.

Everyone grows up quickly in this day in age- you are not the only one. dear.
It is how life is now. Sometimes you have to in order to survive.

In other words, if you didn't lead Billy's life, your problems are trivial. That is some really fucking self-involved shit right there. I agree with his point though... Man Up.

Actually I knew a shitload of folks who had it worse... they made me actually appreciate the fact that much of shit that happend when i was a kid didnt spoil me completely and I was still able to have a little bit of a childhood.

But hey, his folks think he is wierd because he dresses goth and one of his friends betrayed him... life has no meaning anymore.

It's kinda half and half- life can be meaningless- but then you can make it have meaning

As long as you pity yourself, you will never be happy. I learned it the hard way.

There is no fucking room in a productive life for self pity.