I'm so damn tired of this ...

I was raised in church, and I still have these goody-too shoes roots inside of me, and I want to get the fuck rid of them and devote myself to having the horniness in me instead of the holiness.

Long story short, I'm sick of the fundamentalist bullshit that says that what I can do is sit around and think about what I cannot do. I'm at the point where I know my body and the bodies of other adults were put on this earth for complete pleasure. I'm not talking about manipulating anyone. I'm talking about getting in touch with, and being filled by, that divine energy of insatiable horniness. I want the spirits to descend on me and use me while I sleep, and use me as a conduit to spread the horniness through the world, opposite of how I've tried to spread the holiness. I was raised in a Christian school and this is complete hypocritical bullshit for me to go on pretending I don't want this life of tantalizing myself and others.

I want to dream of this, eat, sleep, breathe it. I want to help repressed people be free and walk out of their prison, but I want to come out of my prison first. One thing I'd like to do is invent this pleasure device called "The Chamber" that's been in my mind for some time now, which is basically sealed like a coffin, and you climb inside, and someone shuts the lid and snaps it shut, the lights go out on you, and all these pleasure devices get activated to pleasure your restrained body. There will be a unit model for women, and one unit model for men. Who knows, maybe even one for couples or groups

There's this hot fetish lover inside of me which I want to unleash, and I want to be a conduit for the horny spirit's electricity. I feel this energy and person hovering over me while I lie down, and it's trying to love on me, wrap around me and come in me, and I desire this. I lie there and meditate on him [her]. It is so warm and tingly all over my body. I want to do whatever to open the floodgates to let this take over.

Many people have contributed very negative things, like wars, etc. I want this to be my major contribution to the world, that just like Thomas Edison brought us tangible electricity, I want to bring this erotic electricity to adults all over the place. I know that whoever could receive it would love it as much as I have. It is so euphoric and addictive that you zone out and are engulfed by his consciousness. DAMN, it's so sweet and addictive to you.

I want this "holy" spirit in me no longer. I need some horny spirits to lie with me. I need to spread some love around and help this world be a calmer place through release and through the stopping of suppression and the stopping of repression.

This is a serious inquiry. I'm not trying to play a joke.

Stephen

the problem is you're looking to spirits for what humans are fully capable of developing on their own.

go to a bookstore, they have sections for adults that will have books suggesting wonderful ways to become more attuned with your human sexuality, leave the spirits out of it, as you've learned from church they only complicate interpersonal relationships.

no magic or mysticism can help you with this...there's a lot more to sexuality than just pleasure.

if you're living away from home and most of the religious influences in your life, that should be a start. going away for college tends to help.

i think you are observing your point of view about this in a wrong way stephen. it sounds very silly to me. you will see what i mean from this out of my own reply. if you were to go back and re-read your post. i agree with jordyn here.

yeah just go to an erotic store or bookstore and get yourself laid... that should basically solve the problem.

If you wanted to do those things you would, religion be damned. Unless youre so weak willed that you let a little thing like upbringing sway what you will do.

Probably just doesn't know how to contact that part of himself. Enforced repression can be very powerful.

BlakBlonStreaks, Begin first by exploring touch, enjoying it, the masterbation, playing with other people etc. If you can let go and let in arise from with in and let it out then your wish will be as fufilled.

The point is, noone is enforcing anything other than himself. If he truly wanted to do that stuff he would. Its evident that he doesnt.

That is the truth of the situation but it is simply not that easy to break ingrained rules.
He has been brainwashed / trained/ taught to feel a certain way about it. And it is simply not that easy to just go out and do it becuase outr brains are not lightswitches.
If he wants to do this more than he wants to hold onto whatever the fundies tuaght him then he has a chance to break free, but it is still ropes that he must stop restraining him first.
If he doesn't want it enough he will of course surely fail. If is desires are strong then he'll end up going that way whether we help or not, much like the birth of a river, but I see no reason not to help him. It can't hurt anyone but him afterall.

hmmm... i don't think that breaking 'ingrained' rules is hard once you know how, and even before that it doesn't take much. i mean, our brains aren't lightswitches, alright, but what society brainwashes us into believing only lasts as long as we allow it. actively, not passively allow it. maybe it's just me but i'm pretty sure i could convince myself to do anything through rationalization, apathy and other terrible things.

I'm not saying it can't be done I am saying that you can't just change who you have been for years by snapping your fingers.

Thank you all for your responses. I think the answer lies somewhere in the middle of all of them. I am going into some fasting and prayer about this for a few days. Say some hot prayers for me.

Thanks

i had a right proper catholic upbringing...

rules are really insignificant, especially when they don't make sense.

If you're praying and fasting, Gd will provide what you need, in his own way...and what would work best for your nature...if it's a sexual nature, he'll nurture it.

are you ready for all the serious emotional baggage and physical risks that come with sexual relationships, no matter how brief or long they may be?

what concerns me is that you've got the presentation of watching one too many movies showing the glamorous side of sexuality, sex isn't always pleasurable or pretty, a whore is a whore and always will be.

Disagree, if you want to do something, you do it. If you DONT want to do something you dont do it. If he is brainwashed, then he obviously DOESNT want to do what he is saying, he is just taking the piss to "shock and awe" people.

Well, just from his response to all the advice people gave to him, it sounds like he will fail at it. After all he didn't commit did he? It sound like after hearing things he would have to do he went looking for a fence post and just shoved it up his butt.