what is the difference between people who do hold on to grudges... from the ones who DON'T hold on to grudges?

anyway what is your answer to this and which one are you?

as for me i'm the type that would hold on to grudges.

the difference is that people who hold grudges are the ones that hold grudges, and people who don't hold grudges tend not to hold grudges.

i don't hold grudges. however, if i feel like a person is contributing negatively to my life, i have no problem demoting them to the Acquaintance Bin. I had to do that recently with someone because she was just a super-shitty friend on a very deep level. Unlike a grudge, that's not something to "forgive and forget."

Well I think the people who don't hold grudges are perhaps a little more kind, understanding, and accepting. I'm not saying that people who hold grudges aren't these things but it seems that people who don't more often have these qualities.

I myself am a person who holds grudges. Once you really piss me off and fuck me over I hate you, and I never forget. I know that sounds immature but thats just me. Rachel's a bitch, no changin' her. *shrug*

I hold grudges, but only with people who down right piss me off, like my ex-stepmother and a few of my exs who were utter bitches, other than that, I tend to be pissy for a little while then get over it

There are a few people walking around wasting oxygen who are only allowed to do so because I don't figure their miserable lives are worth me doing 25 to life.

Obviously you are a grudge holder Synikul.

If it was that worth it to dispose of them, you should be able to do so without getting caught.

Microscopic forensic evidence is the hard part. It's almost impossible to not leave any behind.

Hair gel, shower cap, couple of chunks of wood, no short clothing items, gloves, hell just look up mob hits man

My problem is that for me, holding a grudge requires a lot of effort. For me to hate someone is to flex a muscle, and I don't last long before I have to rest. And when that rest hits, I realize that it's much easier and more rewarding.

I think it can also depend in the way you hold a grudge. If you hold it as a lesson learnt to remember to hate said type of person for safety issues to your own psyche, contrary to an "I'm out to get you" or "I'm so caught up in jealousy" or "I'm going to make it my goal to try to change said types of people" then, it can be a good thing.

I don't like holding grudges, myself. It's bad karma. But that doesn't mean that I don't hold them either...if I do, it's very unwilling and it becomes core to me to rid myself of that negativity, because I tend to be a really deep person...blah blah.. you get my drift.

Lastly, I've noticed that people who don't hold grudges can sometimes be really dense/ignorant people who think they're so strong and "have better things to do" since they are caught up in their sense of importance/ambition which really only leads them into a repetitive cycle of pain and misery. I'm not trying to make that sound like some value judgement either. Rather, I'm saying that grudges don't really always mean "hate" and a lack of control over one's emotions...all in my [humble] opinion.

i dont usually hold grudges anymore, its just not worth my effort.

and i do usually forgive everyone. ALMOST always. if you were to steal my man? no forgiveness. fuck that.

and tho i do usually forgive, i never forget. once you forget, youre setting yourself up for a fall. once someone breaks my trust, i fogive them with time, but ill never forget that they did that to me.

I think women hold grudges more often then men do.. At least their better at remembering everything you do wrong!!

i think you're speaking about a different generation....

i know a lotta guys that are whiny, bitchy, emo grudge-holding great memory fuckers. just like i know a lotta women like that.

most woman have a damn good memory if theyve been fucked over.

i hold grudges.........but i can also forgive and forget......but it takes time.....

then again, there are some people i absolutely hate and will continue to hate.....i'm actually a pretty good judge of character (or rather, whether or not someone and myself may become friends)......but if a friend pisses me off, depending on the severity of it, depends on whether or not i'll hold a grudge......but with time they usually fade......it can take days, months, even years......

I don't hold grudges, I just go out and kill people to death, it's therapuetic like.

Seriously though holding a grudge just sucks your will to live, bleeds your spirit, and makes you bitter and twisted.

o0o0o u kill em to DEATH!? u dont just kill them to unconciousness?

fuckin with ya.

yeah thats why i dont hold grudges, i dont wanna be bitter like alot of the people i know.

i do hold a grudge against one ex-friend.... he got my very recent (at the time) ex-girlfriend drunk, and tried to do things with her while she and i were in a kind of tenuous situation. he's back in town, and sent me an e-mail saying that he wants to hang out again. after laughing out loud, i deleted the e-mail.... besides, if I saw him, i'd probably want to hurt him. she still has nightmares about the guy.

A-fucking-men.

But yeah, I really don't do the grudge thing. It's just lame, and takes to much 'caring' from me to do so. I'd rather spend my time caring about the people I do like.

I've held one serious grudge. It lasted for many years and in the end I had to physicallly hurt someone. There is one thing that literally makes my blood boil in this life and thats men who beat women.

My sisters ex-boyfriend is reminded of that every time he looks in the mirror.