Enough people have asked me, 'So Iron, I hear you and Elvis had a thing going. What's up with that?'
Well, I've decided to tell all you lucky people about my short fling with the King.
One day, I decided to take a ride to Graceland, where the king is buried. I was walking around, just lookin at stuff, when I came upon the tomb of the king. (This was before the whole Necrophile thing started) I sat and thought to myself, 'Damn that thing can hold a pink Cadillac'. I wondered if he actually did have a car in there. The nagging thought bothered me, so I decided to open 'er up and have a look-see. To my surprise there was a pink cadillac in the tomb, and sitting in the car was Elvis, wearing nothin' but his blue suede shoes. He said he wanted be to do him Hound-dog style. I couldn't say no! He was the king, after all. Needless to say, the love-thing didn't work out. Elvis was a fat whore. Screwed everyone and their dog, that man did. I broke it off and moved to the Heart Break Hotel. Then I decided, 'Ah, screw it. I can have anyone I want.' It wasn't a lie, either.
So now you know my story. Have a nice fuckin' day

Thank you for relating your story of sleeping with the dead body of Elvis Impersonator Floyd Pervis of Amarillo, Texas.
It is well known by all conspiracy theorists that Elvis is still alive. There are many confidential inside sources who have informed us of that.

And, it just makes sense. If you think about, Elvis was at the end of his career in 1976. He was fat, wore tacky jumpsuits, and hadn't come out with anything decent for years. He was stuck doing shows in Vegas and Hawaii.

But, once news of his supposed "death" came out, Graceland became a multi-million dollart mecca, memorabilia poured out of giftshops all over the country, and sweaty towels that Elvis used at performances and other odd items became expensive heirlooms. Death was the best thing for Elvis' career.

This will be comfirmed once and for all when the apocalypse arrives. According to a reputable paper, the Weekly World News, we will know when the apocalypse has arrived because the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse will meet all the angels along with Bigfoot, Yeti, the Loch Ness Monster, the Crop Circle Aliens, the Greys, Hitler, Satan, Jesus Christ, the World's largest Baby, the World's Smallest Man and Woman, and of course, Elvis, at the place hwere the Lost Dead Sea Scrolls are hidden, and The Truth will finally be revealed to mankind at long last. Hallelujah!

Ever hear of lovable Ed Gein...... he was doing the necrophilia thing before any of us were born...... Though I loved your story....... The Church Of Elvis will only have one competitor in the 21st century.... The Church Of Lennon.. gahhhh I hate the beatles..... Long live the King

I know he's dead. I wouldn't have screwed him if he was alive, after all. I have his penis on my mantel to prove it. The guy I had hot love with wasn't an impersonator...Check it out when he comes back to life to rule all us sinful people. If it was an impersonator that I screwed, our futeure ruler will still have a penis then, won't he?

wow...this is one thread that should be turned into a thread about luv. don't you think skorp?
i love ya Skorp.

who the hell is this skorp guy he is pissin me off!

Skorp is short for Skorpion. lay the fuck off, dumb ass.

Heh heh...a fight. Cool. Let's see what ya got

no fights damnit, he has a 50 foot anal probe lol. or maybe he's dead, have you fucked anyone with a 50 foot anal probe?
love to all

Actually, yes I have. I hate to say it, but it was almost...pleasant...

anal probes...elvis...*shudder*
This is nuts I tell you, nuts!
*picks up the bag*
See, even if they may have green fuzzy shit on 'em, they're still nuts.Its just mold, people.No need to stare.geez...

Really, i'll have to go find a 50 foot anal probe now! gosh, when you think you have all the sex toys. oops sorry.lol

did u say i put a 50 foot prob up my ass u bitch

ya, dont ya love it?

There you are Skorp. i love ya
my buddy bobbyjiggler came on as dark, and told me it was him so i said he had a 50 foot anal probe. then ironphsyco told me 50 foot anal probes are fun and that about sums it up. lol.
I'm sooo bored.
love to all

I've decided to start harrassing you online as well as offline, Iron. Are you as excited about that as I am?

Other dead people churches that are trying to compete with Elvis: Jim Morrison, JFK/RFK, MLK,Jr., Bob Marley, Jerry Garcia, Kurt Cobain... anyone know if Janis or Jimi has a religion springing up around them yet?

Floyd Pervis?... Wasn't he J.Edna... ummm, I mean Edgar... Hoover's right-hand-(job-)man?...Oh never mind... that was Melvin Purvis....My bad.

Oh...and I just have to say it..."I did NOT have an anal probe!!!!"

I had sex the other day with a sexy alien girl.... though it felt like a massage and wasn't all that much fun... I think I am going to stick with human females....

wow skorpion. your theory makes sooooo much sense. i see the error in my ways. i wanna go home to!!!lol

anywayz, denis rodman is from the planet Zerg, he has to keep dying his hair 'cuase the fumes are the same thing he breathes back home. i swear it's the truth.

luv ya

Skorp...are you trying to muscle in on Me & Dyshade's action...that wouldn't be very nice ya know!