i'm old school. straight peppermint or spearmint white or green toothpaste since forever. last week i took a walk on the wild side and bought colgate "paradise fresh". well geez, it's purple and it tastes weird. why is it purple? who thinks paradise is purple? why assume purple tastes like paradise? and how fresh is paradise really? lots of things decompose in that heat. i wouldn't necessarily consider it fresh. and who decides these things? who's brain impulses match with the neocortical pleasure centre studies that went with the development of this particular product?

(playing with my ta-ta's, fuck, buttsex, panda pen0rs.) (gratuitous attempt at triple star rating)

par·a·dise (pr-ds, -dz)
n.
1. A place of ideal beauty or loveliness.
2. A state of delight.

how do you get that its hot in paradise?


(2.5 stars for saying fuck and panda in same post)

Par·a·dise /ˈpærəˌdaɪs, -ˌdaɪz/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[par-uh-dahys, -dahyz] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–noun a town in N California. 22,571.

oh good. that' saves my ass from explaining why paradise is hot. but seriously, in all the freezing cold situations i've been in in my life, no one has ever said "this is paradise".

i think paradise would taste like pineapple and whipped cream and should be yellow.

valhalla is cold.

take that norsemen....

what he said

Better that you don't try the grape & bubblegum toothpaste I found once.
Whoever came up with this combination needs to be shot. Twice.

Might as well have cabbage flavoured toothpaste. It's that bad.

After about 9 jagers and a keg of PBR, I thought the Resurrection River in Seward, AK was paradise.

pbr is nasty

i thought you loved alaska? i'm surprised you would need so much inspiration :-)

whoever came up with that should be shot. on sight. no questions asked.

and if cold valhalla is paradise, then paradise fresh toothpaste should taste cool and bracing - like, i dunno... say... MINT. my point again exactly.

i'd like bubblegum that was toothpaste. that'd rock. bubblegum that cleans your teeth whilst you blow bubbles with it. that'd rock.

you get that gum by wrigleys that help clean your teeth, not exactly bubblegum, but it's close.

true. but i want like, real bubblegum that does it

Or beer flavored toothpaste. That would be even better. Brushing your teeth for the buzz.....now THAT'S marketing.

(Coming soon in new Vodka flavor!)

mmmm yum

toothpaste should not be any flavor other than mint, spearmint, winter-mint, or even peppermint.

any other flavor is blasphemy to the paste-god.

I'd like a blood or shit flavored paste...ya know something to really screw with the idiots I hang out with

well I bet your popular with your group of friends...

hmmm not really but the morons still trust me with thier lives