Regardless of your age, take down any pin-up posters of women or even men from the walls of your room, if you have any. Hide your dirty magazines. Hide any other things which could be taken as sexual in nature. Most important, make your room clean and neat. Put a set of fresh sheets on bed and make bed in neat manner. And the bathroom. Make it sparkling clean. Hang fresh towels. Put new bars of soap, one near the sink and the other in the shower. Does your bathroom have a ventilator fan? Whether it has one or not, it's a good idea to have a room-odor eliminating spray can and place it prominently in front of a toilet bowl. (You know women sit, don't you?) It would be a nice touch to have a new toothbrush in case she forget to bring her own. Do you have another room you can sleep in? If you do, make an offer to her that you would sleep in another room and she can keep your whole room to herself during the night. She may say you wouldn't have to do that, but make an offer any way. That will give her the impression that you are a true gentleman (which you may not be).

Let's continue with our preparation.

After removing your dirty magazines (preferably OUT of your room in case she get the room to herself and possibly go through your stuff in the middle on night), put a few well-perceived magazines/newspapers, casually scattered around in your room.

Recommended magazines/newspapers:

National Geographic

Scientific American

Premier

Nature

Wall Street Journal

New York Times

Enquirer

We need a general news magazine:

U.S. News & World Report

We have to have a contingency plan then.

How many condoms should he have ready? (I guess he should hide them outside of his room, though.)

Should they be ribbed or smooth?

Oh yes, I almost forgot, a box of Kleenex. Yes, that's an essential item.

dude. you're starting to bug me.

you've never been laid, have you? girls don't come back to your house because they want a weird bed to sleep in, girls come back to your house because they want to fuck. it's pretty difficult to fuck the girl you just brought home when she's in the other room.

How is this guy still here? Seriously..

seems you can't be banned for being annoying.

I guess you're right.

yeah because im going to bring a girl to my "room" in my mommies and daddies house. Be a real man and rent a hotel room with a hot tub and stuff that shit like a turkey all night long. Minibar is a plus.

The kleenex is for when your crying cause you just became whipped right.

Naw Bitch I Payed Eleventy Billion Dollars For That Britney Spears Poster Its Staying Up.

You can sleep in the geust room with jessie, if she starts projectile vomiting blood its not her fault she just drinks alot. Just smack her around or something. I got you a toothbrush, it's in the microwave.

LMFAO....

First of all, lots of girls like porn... from my experience, alot of girls own as much porn if not more than most guys. Now, granted it has to be the right kind of porn to catch a girls eye (where guys are less discriminating)... so keep the really dirty shit in your secret porn cave.

Second, you have doomed yourself to a night/lifetime alone by offering to sleep on the couch/other bed. even if she wanted to fuck you really bad, she wants to look around your room more .... sneaky bitches.

Third, that chick had better be gone by morning, no need for toothbrush.

Fourth, National Geographic??.... Wallstreet Journal??... either read them because they are good sources of information or dont read them at all. I swear to god this is the lamest thing I have heard all day..."im going to go buy a wallstreet journal so susie-joe from down the block will suck my dick.... sweet"

Fifth, Condoms should be kept next to the bed... if not taped to her forehead... if you are as fucking retarded as you sound, your probably going to be banging some really nasty bitches... so keep them close.

good call on the fresh sheets and clean bathroom... I swear you can a make a chick cum just by doing those two things. ive seen it.

omg!!!!!

so, i want to take these magazines and shove them up your ass, then clean out your freshly ruined ass with your fucking tooth brush

please oh please

stop posting

LOL funniest thing ever. what he said about cleaning your ass out with a toothbrush. funniest shit ever.

All those magazines are going to make a chick think you're a pussy.

National Geographic

Scientific American

Premier

Nature

Wall Street Journal

New York Times

Enquirer

U.S. News & World Report