When I modeled I had an agent, took training and had professional photographs taken of me. It was like I was popular, because I wasn't. Not in school or really anywhere else. It made my friends jealous though. They didn't know it wasn't that big of a deal, as long as you are serious about being there and making money.

Now there are all kinds of people angry at me and I have to admit that my old friends are behind it. They would say mean things about me and some of it would circle back to me, but then they just started to outright lie trying to be popular.

Come to think of it I wasn't even that popular when modeling. Men would just objectify me. At first I felt hallow about it, like oh well, but now I feel threatened. They are my enemies now, because they just don't care about me, my future or my feelings. I don't know what to do. Unless they break a law like steeling or tresspassing I can't even have them arrested. I already tried reporting it to the police. It is so funny how somewhat kind-of alright memories can be misqued. For the most part after the treatment I have had I would rather die than date any of the men I met back then. Probably just hurt them first though. Thinking of them as nice and wanting to date has gone to serious thoughts of hurting them violently if they approach me. It isn't a good feeling.

I thought about going back and even got offered another job on the weekend. Declining the offer, it is probably better to lay low.