"I seem to need some notice before people pop by so that I can get into a mental frame of mind to chat and play hostess"


Exactly the same here.
I need to plan ahead!! I don't like unexpected visits.
It's forced upon you to be social and talkative, which I'm usually not.(talkative that is)
So yes, it takes some time to prepair myself...and what about if the house is a mess ;-)
I need time to clean up before arrival.