i'm glad turak found us here, i'm finally starting to see the light.

what have i been doing all this time? i've been killing grass by walking on it, protozoa by digesting in im the water i drink, swallowing spiders while i sleep and think of all the food i eat! all those lives destroyed for my existence! oh tuna fish! oh tomatoe! oh bacon and lettuce! damn my perverted desire for delicious food!

oh, how foolish to consider a human life better than a tomatoe. oh, i see it all so clearly now. think, really think, like turak is telling us, about cutting a baby's head open and making a sandwich. it looks like a tomato, doesn't it? coincidence or something more?

christ, we need to stop eating the world or else, before long, there'll be no food left to eat! jesus, it's all so obvious when i think about it. what've i been doing all my life!!!

oh, it's so true, i'm so worthless by virtue of my poor luck at being born into a normal 1st world life. why couldn't i have been a tomato? at least i wouldn't have been evil. at least i would have had that.

i'll wake up every day now and realize that i shoudln't think about hard questions since i'm privileged, stuck up and already so far twisted from the good path that my very thought process is a perversion of nature. i am not a part of nature, humanity is unnatural. omg! the light!

oh, oh yes, it's such a warm feeling to finally know the truth. it's like a warm blanket that helps me plant beans with the others who've seen the light, though it's cold out and i'm stark naked (clothes? christ jesus.) oh damn it, the world is such a precious place, it makes me sad that i'm even here to take care of it - all these years of taking from the world without giving back.

but wait! omg! dogs and cats are evil too! we've made them evil and they must be eliminated! all they do is eat other living things! they're like death machines! well, i'll know what to do to all the kittens i see from now on. isn't it marvelous how much wisdom can be derived from such a small collection of non-contradictory facts of life? of nature?

in fact, i might go so far as to start worshipping turak. he must have spoken directly to god, and anyone who disagrees does not have an education and should research some facts. one cannot know what is absolutely right or wrong without having that wisdom imparted directly by god. hence, either turak has spoken with god directly, or is the g-man himself. i never believed in god before, but i believed such rash things! that eating was ... good? that... the world existed for our benefit? that... the strong would triumph over the weak? that... thought is possible unless hypothetical situations cease to be hypothetical by direct experience? these vague ideas are now so laughable to me as to be dismissable.

oh, i used to wish my existence had meaning, used to wonder whether or not my existence was even debatable. now i know that, simultaneously, neither does it matter if i exist nor does it have any meaning, and moreover that even thinking about it makes me evil.

in my musings i've realized that mathematics is evil, vague abstract ideas used only to perpetuate our meaningless existence on this naturally superior planet. it is invented by evil beings to evil ends and is thus the devil's plaything.

philosophy, too, is wrongheaded since we all know what is true (if you didn't before, you do now, thanks to our god king, turak) and anything else is just the meaningless result of our generation's being lied to by evil consumerist capitalist money-pandering, murdering, selfish and generally evil overlords.

however, our benign leader does leave us just enough (just enough) leeway in interpreting his absolute, eternal and unwavering truths, that is, while saying what's wrong with the world, he leaves it to us to determine what is right. he tells us we're wrong without giving away the answer, thus setting us in the right direction without (explicitly) dictating the future of forumkind. bravo, duca! bravo, maestro! i see a definite parallel between turak's not telling us what to do and his giving creatures 'free will'. he gives us a nudge, but it has to be us that does it. then he can nod in approval and we can die fulfilled.

turak, ascend back to heaven, i will spread your gospel. go taste the nectar and ambrosia of heaven and wait for us, your disciples, to ascend to live with you forever and ever in the eternal and overarching luminescence of your ultimate omnipotence and total omniscience.

turak, god among men, departs for the heavens. so it was in the second coming of the lord.