I was directed to this thread via AIM by one concerned Billy, and I totally understand why. I'm usually not one to give advice, nor am I one to bash the advice of others, but some of the shit I've read is downright frightening. There is *no* such thing as "overthinking" when it comes to this, and "going with the flow" is probably the worst advice I've ever read in this case. "Going with the flow" implies that the issue at hand isn't really a big deal, and anyone with a third of a brain knows that it is. Why? Because I guarantee you 99% of humanity's initial response to something like this would be "ew." It could expand to "Ew, but..." or "Ew... however...," but it's instinctive: herpes is a very unpleasant thing, and it never leaves ya. It may occasionally go on vacation, but it always leaves some of its friends around to house-sit while it's gone. It is a life-altering condition, and that cannot be refuted.

So, when I see people in this thread telling one of my best friends not to overthink something that can and will alter her quality of life - whether she stays with him or not - I want to line all those people up against a wall, take a nine iron, and turn their groins to pudding. That shit makes me livid. I 10000% understand how difficult it is, particularly since emotion is the most powerful thing we have, but acting purely on emotion is the dumbest thing you can do in pretty much any scenario. That's how murders tend to happen, for Christ's sake. The human brain should play some kind of role in any decision; I've learned this the hard way, and I know every one of you fuckers have too. Also, bear in mind that she's 20; I doubt she's at the point where she's thinking about settling down and joining a sewing circle. Not yet.

*switches to second-person*

I don't care about the age or anything, because you are one maturrre lady. You actually seem more mature than he does, from what you've told me So, that doesn't affect my assessment of anything. THIS, my friend, is my official, unblemished advice: if you are 100% sure that you are going to stay with this dude for the rest of your life, and if you love him enough to see yourself doing all the things you wanna do with him in the picture, then go for it. However, since I know for a fact that you can't say that, you should get out. It's so not worth it, and I'm pretty goddamn concerned.

Of course, you're the one who has to decide, not me. I'm just like one of those motivational speaker-types. Matt Foley, if you will. I just want you to be able to exist as comfortably as possible, and were you to go the way of Jobe's lil' recommendation, for instance, I think you might run into problems in many areas of your life. If I just "went with the flow," I guarantee you I'd have been dead years ago.