I drink probably about once every 2 or 3 months.
Now is one of those times. I've had 4 bacardi breezers already and I have a bottle of wine on standby. This will probably have me very very drunk, and this is when I've eaten 3 meals today.

My 17th birthday I had a bottle of wine and a few JD and coke's on a 4 days empty stomach and I threw up all over the ladies' in the restaurant. I felt so guilty I sent someone back the next day with a £50 tip for the girl who served me salted black coffee and had to clean up. People had to carry me home and I had to be shown the way to my bed I was so fucked.